Part 3 of my live-tweet of To Train Up a Child by Michael and Debi Pearl. Do mute this thread if it is going to be picking at scabs that have already healed, give yourself grace, you don't have to go back.
Something that I have picked up by sharing and speaking to others, is this:
It was real
It was systematic
It was wrong
You deserved better
"When the time comes to apply to rod, take a deep breath, relax, and pray, 'Lord, make this a valuable learning session. Cleanse my child of ill-temper and rebellion. May I properly represent your cause in this matter.'"
If you absolutely obey them, you are supposedly safe, and only they will be affected if they are wrong.
Later, when that Authority figure is a Christian school teacher, a Pastor, a Husband, the child has been conditioned to believe they have God given right to cause them pain.
🙄🙄🙄 Okay, that sounds like a safe system.
It's absolutely RIPE for abuse.
"The child should be able to anticipate the coming rod, by your utterly calm and controlled spirit."
I'm sure it's great for your children to be terrified when you are calm and controlled.
I'll talk bout my experience of this in a bit.
"If...already rebellious...use whatever force is necessary to bring him to bay."
The skirts being smoothed down so that a proper swish of the cane would impact properly. Do you know what that sounds like? You shouldn't, and if you do, I'm sorry.
The cane whistles in the wind.
I'm sorry, what the fuck though, are they going to transform from a pumpkin into a carriage because you are fucking whacking them with a stick?
FIVE TO TEN? YOU SICK FUCK?
Suddenly the one to three that we'd get doesn't sound so fucking bad.
And let's move on
Oh so you DO HAVE some boundaries! That's great. Well done. You've burnt down the house but you've made sure to use bio-fuel not petrol.
Conditioning by use of pain for control.
To use your hand in a moment of human annoyance is not systematic, it's exactly what they are against.
Me, this book
I don't.... I.........
Give me strength. 🖐️🙄🙄🙄🖐️
Oh yes, they all had names:
Meet Sammy Slipper, Colin the Cane and Rodney (don't applaud).
I mean.....I don't know what to say about that.
At dinner/chapel times, it lived above the doorframe for quick access, or sometimes laid in front of dad on the table.
He would not.
This went on for a very, long, endless, horrendous, scorchingly long time.
He must have been five, maybe?
Remeber, its not about punishing wrong doing, it's surrendering the child to the parents will.
From the book: "Defeat him totally."
Reader, they did not.
There's obviously no such thing as being given over to Satan, but as a threat as a kid?
Okay but if your NORMAL is that NEVER hitting a child is okay, you are much LESS likely to hit them when the frustration strikes, surely?
I can stop this child annoying me (by existing) by hitting them with a stick, when frustration strikes, what's going to be the natural inclination?
Stand, spin, reach, whip the cane off the top of the door, and now the parent is in charge.
NO. DON'T DOUBT YOUR REALITY!
Then it was in English and people got to read it for themselves, but very quickly, Leaders told us How to read it.