Thread by @jessepinho

Want to hear a disaster story about my worst-ever work travel experience, courtesy of @Airbnb? BUCKLE UP.

A year ago, I attended the React Europe conference in Paris. I booked an Airbnb well ahead of time, but the host canceled shortly afterward because he hadn't bothered to arrange a place for himself while I was at his flat. Fortunately, I had a month to find a replacement Airbnb.

Fast forward to this year. Planning to attend React Europe again, I booked an Airbnb on the 17th of February for my stay from 21-26 May. That is, I booked my Airbnb *three months* in advance of the conference. Any guesses where this is going?

On 20 May — *one day* before I was scheduled to land in Paris — my host (different guy this time!) told me he hadn't arranged a place for himself to stay and couldn't host me. Second year in a row this happened for work travel; but this time, I had to scramble to find a new place

I called @Airbnb support in a bit of a panic and requested a replacement Airbnb as close to the conference as the original one. The original one was about a 5-minute walk from the conference center, and that was important to me since it started early in the morning.

.@Airbnb refused to give me a nearby replacement, saying they would only give me a maximum of a 250€ discount on a replacement booking. Problem was, all the nearby ones were 4-500€ more than my original booking's price, probably since it was so last-minute.

Instead, they sent me various listings from other parts of Paris nowhere near the conference — including one that was literally a futon in a shared room. I couldn't believe they were serious. But I had no other options.

Finally, I caved and decided to use the 250€ discount to book one of the more expensive ones that were near the conference, and simply pay the difference myself. There were actually only two available at this point. I requested to book one of them, and...

...the host told me that it was too last-minute, and she wouldn't have time to clean the place before I arrived. (Why, then, was her flat still listed as available?!) I immediately requested to book the other one. Same thing! Not available, even though it was listed on @Airbnb.

.@Airbnb support then called me back with exciting news — they'd found a replacement that would be covered by the refund of my initial booking plus the 250€ discount! Yay! Except... it was a 30-minute commute to the conference, where I had a workshop at 8:30am the next day. Ugh.

But you know, I'm 30 now. I figure I can suck it up and wake up a bit earlier. So I go ahead and book the Airbnb and breathe a sigh of relief. I had a place to stay!

If only I knew what was to come...

I get to the Airbnb the next day and the host's brother meets me to hand over the keys. There are three keys on the ring, but he tells me I only need one of them: the one that opens the door to the flat itself. "What about the gate out front?" I ask. He says it's always unlocked.

I tried each of the other keys on the gate but none of them work. He insists again that it will remain unlocked, and that I don't need a key for it.

Then he leaves, and I enter the flat to check it out. Dear lord, where to begin... Let's start with the bathroom.

It felt like a utility closet. There was a bucket inside with cloths on top of it. There was a gross accumulation of dust and grime on the floor. The toilet seat was barely attached to the toilet. The cabinet under the sink was broken.

There was also only one roll of toilet paper. Keep in mind that this was a 5-night stay, so... I had to budget.

Moving on to the living room: dust everywhere. The entertainment center/shelf in the center looked like it hadn't been cleaned in a few weeks. The router at the bottom was unplugged, and maybe I'm being a bit precious, but I was too grossed out by the dust to plug it in.

And then there was the issue of the bed. Apparently they were going for the minimalist aesthetic: all there was on the mattress was a duvet and two pillows. "What's wrong with that?" you ask? That was *all* there was on the mattress — no fitted sheet!

No wait, let me be a bit more precise. That's not *all* there was on the mattress. There were also large yellow stains and some... I don't even know what. Leaves? Dirt?

Sigh. No place like home.

At least, on the bright side, I wasn't going to spend much time there. The important thing was that I had a place to crash, right?

Well, that would have been right if it were true. I had booked the @Airbnb an extra night after the conference to go to Paris Disneyland (oh stop judging me, it's magical), with a flight out on Sunday. I got back to the Airbnb on Saturday night at about 1:30am.

I get to the front gate, turn the handle, and... it's locked.

You may remember this gate as the one I didn't have a key to.

Hoping to wake up someone inside the building, I give the handle a hard shake and it gives off a satisfying rattle.

I wait.

No one shows up.

I try it again. And again. I shake the gate so hard I worry someone will call the police. I even shout a few times. Nothing.

Now I'm pissed. I call my Airbnb host's brother, hoping I'll wake him up. I called him 7 times between 1:56am and 2:09am, but I guess his phone was on silent. Then I remember I have the actual host's number, so I call him too. He answers the second time.

"Hi, I'm your Airbnb guest and I'm stuck outside your apartment because the gate is locked. I need you to let me in."

"Oh, I'm in London. My brother takes care of this for me. Try calling him."

I explain I just called his brother 7 times. "Hm... well, why haven't you tried just jumping over the gate?"

Folks, this gate is taller than me and I'm 6 feet tall. I'm half asleep and carrying a heavy backpack. And the top of the gate looks like this:

I tell him that's not an option — I'm not going to climb a 2-meter gate and hope I don't get caught on it at the top and fall over the other side. He tells me, and I quote, "Well, there's nothing I can do for you."

I lost it. "Are you %$&@ing kidding me?" I shout into the phone. I think that part of why I'm so pissed is that he's right: there is literally nothing he can do for me from London. So why the hell is he the host of this Airbnb!?

This whole time, I've been texting with my family in a WhatsApp group giving them play-by-play. My brother Googled hotels in my area, and it turned out there was one just a block away. With no other options, I checked in for the night.

And there went another 198€.

I have no complaints about the hotel, but I didn't have most of what I needed there. My prescription medication, which I take nightly for insomnia and anxiety (and was thus the thing I needed most that night), was locked away in the Airbnb. So was my passport, my fresh clothes...

And while I sat down in the hotel room and tried to calm down, something became very clear to me. @Airbnb is simply not a mature enough product to be used for work travel.

I mean, think about it. My first host had kept my reservation active until the last minute, even though the place wasn't available. The two hosts I tried to book with afterward *also* had listed their flats as available, even though they weren't.

"But it was too last-minute!" you might say. Then they should take their listings down for next-day bookings. "But that's a lot of work to do every day!" Then @Airbnb should make it easier or automatic for them. (In fact, I think they do have this feature.)

"Maybe the hosts just didn't like your profile and that's why they turned you down!" It's possible, but all of my reviews are positive, so I doubt it...? Also, they each gave reasons for turning my request down that had to do with the availability of the flat itself.

Which comes back to my main point: There should never be a listing on @Airbnb that's not actually available. It's pretty simple. Otherwise, Airbnb can't be trusted as a platform if a large portion of their inventory is junk.

I'm now in contact with their support to get a refund for the hotel (which I paid for out of pocket) and the entire cost of the trip (for my learning budget). Their customer support folks have actually been very empathetic and kind, but I don't want kindness. I want a refund.

They've already told me it's possible I will not get a refund for the hotel since I didn't call @Airbnb first, which is crazy to me — it was 2:30am in a place I'm not familiar with and I'm half asleep. My first priority isn't calling Airbnb support; it's getting to bed.

For that matter, the last time I'd called @Airbnb support, their "solution" was the apartment that caused all this in the first place. (I actually did call them that night, but was on hold for a while and then hung up because I didn't want to wait outdoors for them at 2:30am.)

So that's my story. If it's been any bit as entertaining for you as it's been cathartic for me, I would kindly ask that you retweet the first tweet in this thread to help push the needle in the direction of @Airbnb doing the right thing.

I would also kindly ask for your best puppy photos. It's been a long 24 hours: after leaving the hotel for the airport and wishing "good riddance" to this past week, I was pulled aside at security and charged 40€ for having an overweight bag.

If puppies aren't your thing, I will also accept hugs.

THE END.