And now @timallenwagner takes the #serverlessconf stage by storm. Hearty applause.
"Who the f*ck is @timallenwagner to tell us what the future of Serverless is?" He ran the Lambda team at AWS for starters. THIS IS ALL HIS FAULT #Serverlessconf
The audience leans in with anticipation. #serverlessconf
Getting on stage when I'm in the audience is painting a bullseye, but @timallenwagner took that literally it seems. #serverlessconf
Here are the growth areas for Serverless. #serverlessconf
And the things it sucks at. "Kubernetes" missing from the list. #Serverlessconf
Tim's answer was presumably "Quicksight, because that thing is garbage." The slide tells the story of how that ended. #serverlessconf
In light of the video transcoding demo from yesterday (@kneekey23 and @sbarski) this statement didn't age well.

Meanwhile @timallenwagner is aging beautifully. He looks younger every year!

#serverlessconf
Easy. You should build a better @awscloud billing system. #Serverlessconf
This slide looks a lot like my slides before my designer gets to them. #Serverlessconf
Now talking about serverless supercomputers. "We're still missing a few parts, but here's what that stack might look like."

#serverlessconf
Throwing shade at ElastiCache. "It requires servers." The audience laughs mockingly. #serverlessconf
The Serverless Supercomputer Stack, by @timallenwagner #serverlessconf
This zone is stateful and serverless. State in serverless is hard. #Serverlessconf
I really hadn't considered it this way, but it makes perfect sense and is obvious in hindsight. That's the hallmark of a great idea. #serverlessconf
And now the Shaming of the Lambda. #serverlessconf
And @timallenwagner announces that today he's launching a serverless networking framework in beta. #serverlessconf
And @timallenwagner clears the hurdle that so many companies fail to: "WTF would I use this for?" #serverlessconf
Lambda: "Get a file"
S3: "Here it is."

There's a NAT in there.

(If it's the Managed NAT gateway you pay a 4.5¢ processing fee / @awscloud tax on going about your business.) #serverlessconf
And this is what @timallenwagner is envisioning solving for. Three images! #serverlessconf
AND STOP CHARGING THROUGH THE GODDAMNED NOSE FOR DATA TRANSFER while you're #awswishlist counting. #serverlessconf
Peer-to-peer networking for Lambda is fascinating. I'm already picturing a few use cases. #serverlessconf
And he somehow got an axe on an airplane. #serverlessconf
"But... that was our transactions database." #serverlessconf
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