1/10 A 2020 play: Scene: Vladimir Putin, skyping in with POTUS45 and Other Corrupt Minions, June 2020
Putin: Amy WHO??? You jerks told me it was gonna be Joe Biden. Who the hell is this woman?
OCM: Uhhh… this short lady from Minnesota?
#Klobucharmy #AmyForAmerica
Putin: Amy WHO??? You jerks told me it was gonna be Joe Biden. Who the hell is this woman?
OCM: Uhhh… this short lady from Minnesota?
#Klobucharmy #AmyForAmerica
2/ 10 Putin: Okay, we can still do this. What dirt do you got on her?
OCM: Well, there’s this rumor about her being mean to her Senate staff.
<Silence>
OCM: They say she threw a stapler! Her staff were scared of her!
Putin: That’s all you got for me? A stapler?
OCM: Well, there’s this rumor about her being mean to her Senate staff.
<Silence>
OCM: They say she threw a stapler! Her staff were scared of her!
Putin: That’s all you got for me? A stapler?
3/10 <Silence>
OCM: We’ll do some digging.
Putin: <sighs> And you jerks said Biden. Go screw up some more government norms and GET ME THAT DIRT.
<Skype session ends>
OCM: We’ll do some digging.
Putin: <sighs> And you jerks said Biden. Go screw up some more government norms and GET ME THAT DIRT.
<Skype session ends>
4/10 Later in 2020:
Putin: What the hell do you mean, she has Republicans AND Black people campaigning for her? Who the hell is this woman?
OCM: She’s just some lady from Minnesota. None of the pollsters thought she’d get this far! She has a corny sense of humor!
Putin: What the hell do you mean, she has Republicans AND Black people campaigning for her? Who the hell is this woman?
OCM: She’s just some lady from Minnesota. None of the pollsters thought she’d get this far! She has a corny sense of humor!
5/10 Putin: You guys had ONE JOB. Sowing distrust and divisions between the Left and the Right. How can she have supporters all along the political spectrum? What the hell are you guys doing over there?
OCM: We were digging for dirt!
Putin: Right, what do you got for me?
OCM: We were digging for dirt!
Putin: Right, what do you got for me?
6/10 OCM: Well, there’s this article that says she mishandled this one case when she was a prosecutor twenty years ago…
Putin: ONE case? You got a pattern of racism and abusing the system for me?
<Silence>
Putin: You got NOTHING???
Putin: ONE case? You got a pattern of racism and abusing the system for me?
<Silence>
Putin: You got NOTHING???
7/10 OCM: She’s from Minnesota! That means she’s Minnesota nice! But she’s a woman! We can get her with the good old one-two, sexism and misogyny!
8/10 Putin: Guys. That is SO 2016. But that’s all you got. We’ll work with that. <Sighs> Remember when you jerks told me it was gonna be Joe Biden? How many Senators did I have to pay off at that impeachment trial?
<Silence>
Putin: HOW MANY???
<Silence>
Putin: HOW MANY???
9/10 OCM: Umm…. 51??
Putin: Yeah, 51 Senators. You guys must think I’m made of money or something. What a waste of rubles.
<Skype session ends>
Putin: Yeah, 51 Senators. You guys must think I’m made of money or something. What a waste of rubles.
<Skype session ends>
10/10 Same scene, November 2020
Putin: This Amy K woman won the Presidential election with big margins in ALL FIFTY STATES. If you guys think I’m getting you over to Russia now, you’re wrong. You had ONE JOB.
<End> #AmyForAmerica
Putin: This Amy K woman won the Presidential election with big margins in ALL FIFTY STATES. If you guys think I’m getting you over to Russia now, you’re wrong. You had ONE JOB.
<End> #AmyForAmerica
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