Thread by @usnehal

This was me one night intern year, the night of 22 admissions as a solo intern, no cross cover, no team to divide admissions among, no night float, no work hour restrictions, call lasting up to 36 hours. (In those days before safety standards).

I almost left/quit.
#MedTwitter.

https://twitter.com/DGlaucomflecken/status/1379145552655314944

I remember my pager and spectralink going off over and over, it was past midnight. I wasn't going to be "weak" and ask for help from the single resident covering 5 floors or 200+ patients, if I didn't respond to the mom concerned about no poop in a baby for 24 hours...

...that Mom would feel ignored (& file a complaint) but there were also a few admits on Q2 (almost ICU) albuterol waiting in the ED. On acuity, might require earlier attention than the no poop x 24 hours already admitted patient. I remember turning to look at the elevator doors..

I paused for a full minute and thought, "I could leave. I could never come back. I could just walk out and keep walking" (okay this was Houston so driving). I was ready to do it but then thought about the shame of someone else having to come cover my absence, patients waiting...

..so I decided I would stay until the end of my call the next afternoon. Somehow there are those moments that almost break you but if you somehow dig deep and push through you find yourself on the other side of it and you just keep pushing forward instead of quitting.

I work on making sure today's trainees & staff don't face even a fraction of that situation.
Tho now hour restrictions exist, some programs just bully trainees into lying about actual hours.

What I did as a trainee was not safe for anyone.

Be the person you need when younger.