Here are a few things that work for me, in no particular order. I hope it helps. (Curious to hear how others deal with these very common feelings.) 1. Meditation. It not only increases base levels of clarity, concentration and equanimity, but it can provide a much-needed break 1/
..in an otherwise stressful day. You can begin your day with it (which helps make the other parts more manageable, and therefore less tiring), or use it to divide your day up. It can be like a power nap, but one where, rather than shutting down your mind, you're in fact.. 2/
..training it. If you do it before writing, it can help you get to a deeper place in a shorter time. It also helps with managing that anxiety that comes from feeling like you're not doing enough. It helps with all anxiety. 2. Find the joy again in the writing. What do I mean.. 3/
..by that? There's a reason you're drawn to it. Try and locate it, and access it, and abide in that. If you can do that, you can USE your writing NOT as something you "should" be doing, but, rather, as a BREAK from the other parts of your life. But of course that requires.. 4/
.. number 3, which is: fight for your writing time. It's actually more work than you think, to aggressively find - and block out - time to write. And give yourself enough of a window so that you're not rushing, or feeling pressure (for me I need at least a 3 hour window). 5/
And remember: "writing" is not only "pen on paper," or "fingers on keys." Sometimes it's just slow, seemingly-unproductive mulling. You need to allow time for that, too. Which leads me to 4. When you're NOT writing (ie, when you're attending to all the other duties you have), 6/
..try as best as you can to have a FULL EXPERIENCE of what you're doing. Whether it's driving carpool or doing dishes or working the day job. The more focused you can be on what you're ACTUALLY doing (as opposed to doing ONE thing while feeling you SHOULD be doing another).. 7/
..the more the thing you're actually doing will be, in fact, relaxing. Or, at least, less stressful. (This is where meditation helps, too: with practice, you can turn other parts of your day into a kind of walking/living meditation, which in turns saves/builds energy for the.. 8/
..other tasks.) Which leads me to 5. (This is a variation on 2 above.) Try and use your writing as a break from your other routine - and, similarly, use your other routine as a break from your writing. Believe it or not, this is very doable. It's about a MINDSET that involves 9/
ALLOWING yourself to be doing EXACTLY WHAT YOU'RE DOING. Sounds easy? not so much when you feel you "should" be doing something else. Allow yourself your "regular" day - and, similarly, allow yourself your writing time. Which leads to 6. Your unconscious. Trust in it. 10/
WITH INTENTION, your subconscious mind can actually do some of the work for you. But you need to set the intention. Sometimes, for me, it helps if, before I set out to do another task (any of the daily routine that, say, being a parent involves), I give myself the conscious 11/
intention to, at a deeper level, work on something. Then I consciously DON'T think about it. It works more often than you'd think. (Note that there's a difference between PROCRASTINATION and CONSCIOUSLY NOT WORKING.) Finally, I'd say there's 6. Which is: 12/
Get rid of the "shoulds." Believe in your own life, and its value, and the need to do the things you are doing. And ALLOW them to happen. Writing is a delicate thing. It can't withstand the pressure of being the thing that "should" be happening when you are doing the other.. 13/
and very necessary parts of your day. It can't withstand the guilt, or the self-reprimands. It's possible that when you release that weight from it, it will be not just a refuge from the pressures of the rest of your life, but, rather, a delightful escape. But you need to.. 14/
..give it permission to be that. And finally (I know, I said the last one was finally, but I just remembered this one): 7. Tell the rest of your family they can go f*** themselves for a while. And guess what? They'll be fine. They WANT to see their mom do what is deeply.. 15/
..meaningful to her. And to have joy. And to explore her inner world. Even if nothing "comes" of it (ie, it doesn't sell). My mom is a painter. And for some years during our youth she gave it up to parent. It turns out that that didn't help her - and it didn't help US. 16/
It's hard. All this is hard. Finding the balance is hard. But it's a BALANCE. If you can give yourself permission to do both, maybe that balance will help with all aspects. And it takes time. Building these skills takes time and gentle encouragement that will only really come 17/
..from within yourself. But you have to fight the outside world for that space. Oh one more thing. (Sorry) 8. Find a separate place to do your writing. Like a coffee shop, or a tiny office, or something. That helps not just set your intention (ie, "I'm going here to work"), 18/
..but it physically separates you from everything. Sometimes you have to do that to get your into a different mental state as well. Sorry this went so long. Thank you for reading this far, if you did. I wish you the best. You're not at all alone in this. 19/19
