Thread by @tomiahonen

I've run a series of jokes on TW around theme of 'I am the Adjunct Professor at Trump University'. It is the 1 year anniversary for series. Here are the Top 12 Tweet jokes that were most popular, starting with 12th most popular and finishing with most popular. Enjoy (& retweet)

12/12 - I'm Adjunct Professor at Trump Univ Department of Biology and Animally Things. Species 'Individual-One' (Lat: Trumpus-Trumpus) is endangered nearly extinct being hunted by the Pelosi, the Mueller & the Acosta. Some grow prematurely senile, turn orange & start to rake

11/12 - Mr Trump I am Adjunct Professor at Trump Univ PTT Dept of Psychology & Thinky Things. You are suffering from advanced stage of Rush Limbaugh's Disease. You're delusional. Your subconscious is retreating from reality and imagining things such as Satanic red christmas trees

10/12 - I am Adjunct Professor at Trump University Dept of Zoology and Wolfy Things. We ran a long peer-reviewed geneological and behavioral study for seven decades and concluded with help of Professor Emeritus Wolf Blitzer, that Trump is not Wolfian. He is Hyena

9/12 - As Adjunct Professor of Trump Univ Dept of Forestry & Woody Things, I need to clear some myths. Finnish raking does not work in California, because of metric leaves. We tried it. Sarah Palin can still see those leaves from her porch. Also you need an ID to rake

8/12 - You dastardly anarchist revolutionaries! This is outrageous buying cereal without ID! I\m Adjunct Professor at Trump Univ Dept of Nutrition & Eaty Things. I will report you to Cereal Police! You won't be laughing when Captain Crunch comes and takes away your cereal bowls..

7/12 - I am Adjunct Professor At Trump Univ Dept of Meteorology & Windy Things. You can't use giant fans to move the climate in the US because of different electric current & the metric system. But in Finland they do that yes. But we're better off. Here in the US we have asbestos

6/12 - I'm Adjunct Professor at Trump Univ Dept of Geography And Mappy Things. The Australian news coverage made a common translation error from English to English. Paradise is spelled 'pleasure' in the metric alphabet. Trump was speaking to the Finns, because of raking

5/12 - I'm Adjunct Professor at Trump Univ EDT Dept of Extinction & Disappeary Things. Species Homo Repulsus (aka 'republicans') was placed on endangered species list when it contracted Sarah Palin's Disease. Scientists feverishly working on cure but strain rejects facts

4/12 - I am Adjunct Professor at Trump Univ Dept of Philosophy and Thinky Things. That is what advanced studies call 'logic' and there is a measurement of this 'genius' which is the new Trumpian intellect level called 'stable'. It sits roughly between 'moron' and 'idiot'

3/12 - As Adjunct Professor at Trump Univ Dept of History & Oldy Things, I can confirm to you, this is a new age. Like the Bronze Age, Ice Age, Iron Age, this period will be known as the Dumb Age: when a US President told 6,842 lies & somehow 1/3 of dumb Americans believed him

2/12 - I am Adjunct Professor at Trump Univ Dept of Management And Bossy Things. We have a lab in the Fiery Areas, and our researchers have confirmed to us, that the older trees REFUSE to take management responsibility over their younger growth. It is Pelosi's fault

1/12 - Am Adjunct Professor at Trump Univ Dept of Theology & Bibley Things. New Trumpian Bible, Book of Bigly (after Two Corinthians) lists plagues
Lice
Frogs
Locusts
Jims acosta
Refugee caravans
Saudi bone saws
Slovenian First Slut malfunctions
French drizzle rain
Mueller
Pelosi

Do we want more? You mean the Top 12 funniest Adjunct Professor Tweets wasn't enough?

Those were the most popular. How about I do as a bonus, my top 7 faves (not repeating from above of course)... ok. You twisted my arm (lightly)... here goes

Bonus 1/7 - I'm Adjunct Professor at Trump Univ Dept of Biology & Animally Things. Species Ingraham is one of the many trump parasite breeds which usually nests in Fox. Like the Hannity it is endangered and becomes suicidally self-destructive when cornered in its habitat

Bonus 2/7 - I am Adjunct Professor at Trump University Department of Geography & Mappy Things. Finland is a myth. It is based on a hoax by the devious Norwegians played on gullible Sweden. Some tried to rake the whole story under the floor of the forest

Bonus 3/7 - I'm Adjunct Professor at Trump Univ PMT Dept of Paranormal & Magiccy Things. Species Melanius Horribilus (the Migrating Slanty-Eyed Slovenian Slut) often turns destructive towards her mate. The first signs are Satanic red trees and the firings of the underlings.

Bonus 4/7 - I am Adjunct Professor at Trump Univ Dept of Mathematics & Numbery Things. This is an unfortunate but temporary delay in the Navy's implementation of the New Trumpian Digits. They were using OLD MATH. The new digits are One, Two, Oops and Bigly. Six is no more

Bonus 5/7 - I'm an Adjunct Professor at Trump Univ Dept of Matrimony & Wifey Things. Barbaric ritual of weddings was outlawed in New Trumpian Bible as Obamanian. Modern man orders his rental wives from Slovenian hooker catalogs, for periods of 18 years before deported

Bonus 6/7 - I'm Adjunct Professor at Trump Univ Dept of Archeology And Cavey Things. You should not store Republicans inside caves! Their grumpiness reaches critical stage and they 'go Full Giuliani'. Look at Rush Limbaugh or Ann Coulter to see what that looks like

Bonus 7/7 - I'm an Adjunct Professor at Trump University Department of English and Bigly Words. The new Trumpian grammar says you don't complete sentences. A completed sentence is inherently. But you can always. And also. Tremendously :-)