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Charlie Elphicke starts for the Tories with a tedious, badly delivered planted question attacking Labour. Oh good. A day of this shit.
May singularly fails to rule out a permanent customs union.
Corbyn, typically confused, says May is in denial on a customs union, rather than pressing her on it. He moves on to something else.
May now dolloping out her pitiful bullshit on the danger of revoking Article 50. A dimwit versus a fool.
We're now on the default PMQs setting of Corbyn talking vaguely about poverty levels and May vaguely defending against it.
This is the most hopeless bullshit your eyes will ever look upon. Corbyn rambling around on education and the adult skills budget. The customs union issue is sitting there right in front of him.
I think this is it. This is the moment. It's an inept as it gets. I have never seen a politician squander an opportunity this size.
May is demonstrably unable to govern. And this morning she is clearly darting from a weak spot Corbyn has had as a firm policy for months. And he's rambling around policy areas.
It's like watching a sword-fight with wet mops.
Fucking terrible. And now we have Tory MP Robert Goodwill talking about fertiliser.
The state of Westminster. A government which can't govern. An opposition which can't oppose. The majority of MPs so piss-scared by a referendum result they won't stand for anything. And it can't even be watched, because parliament allowed the domain to expire on its video player.
This will go down in history as a moment of supreme humiliation for this country. A downgrading of its economic status, its political strength and its cultural standing.
The political class have had two years to address that and they've singularly failed. They're failing now, right in front of our eyes.
May now trying to justify the fact she is supposedly seeking consensus but without talking to the opposition. Asking her to think in an original manner is like asking a fish to read Wittgenstein.
Ken Clarke here to save us. "The only clear majorities in this House are against leaving with no-deal, in favour of extending Article 50 to give us time, and in favour of a customs union, and sufficient regulatory alignment to keep all our borders open after we leave."
"Will the PM, just as I have had to accept that the majority in this House is committed to leaving the EU, that she must modify her red lines and find a cross party majority which will be along the lines I have indicated."
An actual MP there, thinking independently and without fear of the crowd, like a glimmer of what the Commons could be.
May gives a turgid response, but does not directly reject any of his specific suggestions.
Interesting layer of specificity in her response though. May said, rightly I think, that EU would only extend A50 if there was a British plan to resolve the issue. That shows that, despite her public utterances, they've held discussions in No.10 on how to do it.
You'd have to be a brave betting man to put money on Britain leaving the EU on March 29th right now.
Brilliant, grown-up comment from Nicky Morgan. "We all need to maintain maximum flexibility" in what comes next. That is the precondition for everything right now.
It is particularly important to hear from Norway and People's Vote types. They need to act as a block, leaping on any opportunity, in either direction, and not give in to tribal animosity.
Right, that's PMQs done. Thanks God alive.
Interesting point of order on the photograph taken yesterday in the No lobby. This was against the rules. It's disappointing that MPs and the Speaker are talking about sanctions, rather than changing the stupid and outdated rules themselves.
Anna Soubrey asking about one of her employees who faced abuse this morning. Bercow, interestingly, replies that Met commissioner Cressida Dick said there was a changed mentality about policing the campaigners outside parliament.
Tory Bob Seely asks if Bercow will change procedure on standing orders in how Brexit is debated. Bercow says no, no way. "That isn't a power of the Speaker - the House is in charge of its standing orders."
Bercow asked about Govt abuse of the House, ie on not opposing opposition day motions. Bercow says many MPs have expressed "disappointment, concern & distress" about it. "I put that out there." He's firing off another warning to the govt.
