Thread by @dsquareddigest

I have realised I will find no peace until I have watched "Goldman Sachs: The Movie". I will begin livetweeting soon

Part 1 - Beginnings. D-Sol says "there's very few companies that make it to 150 with the same name"

A sort of odd bossa nova feel to the theme music

Lots of rostrum camera panning across old photos to begin with #goldmanthemovie

the Marcus Goldman "entrepreneurial spirit" and "passion for results" per some talking head partner. GS clearly pushing the founding father's brand these days. #goldmanthemovie

"He was no longer content to be a streetcart peddler, he wanted to do something respectable, like banking" - I somehow feel that a few interim steps have been missed here #goldmanthemovie

Pretty good explanation of bill broking business #goldmanthemovie

oooh first stirrings of interest "The complex relationship between Henry Goldman and Samuel Sachs would shape the firm for the next century"

NIALL FERGUSON KLAXON #goldmanthemovie

I did not know about the alliance between GS and Lehman in the early days, although I suppose I should have guessed (the movie doesn't actually mention the racist dimension of early Wall Street) #goldmanthemovie

This movie claims that Henry Goldman invented the PE ratio. #goldmanthemovie

Well, that was a bit dull. Now Part 2 - Hubris!!! #goldmanthemovie

it starts with NIALL FEREGUSON, the world renowned hubris expert #goldmanthemovie

Quality ass-kissing from Nially here #goldmanthemovie.

they have clearly shelled out a hell of a lot for good quality archive footage to put captions over #goldmanthemovie

Interesting! There was a massive argument between Goldman and Sachs over whether the firm should participate in the War Bonds raised by JP Morgan in 1917. Henry Goldman ended up leaving. #goldmanthemovie

enter Wadell Catchings, who is being built up as a hella pantomime villain. He believed in short term profits! And leverage! He wasn't part of the family! Even though he transparently did the same things they liked in the last episode! #goldmanthemovie

Waddill Catchings, apparently. He advocated buying stocks on margin and marketing risky leveraaged structures to clients, something Goldman would never do in 2007 of course #goldmanthemovie

NIALL FEREGUSON tells us that hubris is inevitably followed by nemesis. #goldmanthemovie

it's not a bad summary of the same things that are discussed in the relevant chapter of JK Galbraith's "The Great Crash" #goldmanthemovie

just for the slow kids in the undergraduate societies, they get a talking head partner to say "THIS IS A CULTURAL LESSON ABOUT OUR FIRM", slowly while looking into the camera. #goldmanthemovie

in a CLIFFHANGER ENDING, we hear that Goldman was sued for $100m and "brokers were sure that the 60 year run of the once proud business was over". No spoilers! On to part 3: Recovery. (dammit, spoilers!) #goldmanthemovie

Blah blah "family firm" is apparently going to be the CULTUReL LesSON from this part according to this talking head. More archive rostrum and captions. #goldmanthemovie

1929 to 1949 were pretty bad years for GS apparently although the photos they run under this voiceover suggests it wasn't really so terrible. #goldmanthemovie

Ahh right, this is the "Sidney Weinberg Story" episode. #goldmanthemovie

chances of someone really really rubbing in the "humble origins and tough upbringing JUST LIKE LLOYD BLANKFEIN" analogy? I think high. #goldmanthemovie

another one for the undergrad crowd, "SIDNEY WEINBERG SET THE CULTURE FOR THE WHOLE FIRM", did you hear that Jeff

WARREN BUFFET KLAXON #goldmanthemovie Weinberg put his arm round him when he was a kid.

this segment is coming perilously close to "How Sidney Weinberg Won The War" #goldmanthemovie

fair do's, it was pretty solid stuff to have landed the IPO role from Henry Ford, for obvious reasons. #goldmanthemovie

CULTURE MOMENT KIDS! the IPO fee on Ford was only $250k and they were so embarrassed they never told anyone. But the league table credit was worth it. #goldmanthemovie

FORESHADOWING KLAXON: Sidney had "misgivings" about Gus Levy and about "trading culture" and too much risk taking #goldmanthemovie

On to part 4 - "Changing Times" ...

talking head time "We embrace change and that's actually reinforcing our culture". Obviously it gets less exciting and more corporate from here on in. #goldmanthemovie. Nice Nixon era footage under the captions

SIDNEY DIDN'T TRUST GUS OK #goldmanthemovie

but all the other talking heads are now saying what a great guy he was, first trader to be CEO etc. #goldmanthemovie SO YOU SEE CULTURE EMBRACING CHANGE

Endless parade of Granpa Simpson types talking about how it used to be a small firm where everyone knew each other back in nineteen dickety #goldmanthemovie

Apparently Gus Levy invented block trading. #goldmanthemovie

Endless plinky jazz in the background as they talk about risk aversion #goldmanthemovie

slight problem with the "civic engagement" cultural theme in this segment as it leads to lots of photos of your management team grinning it up with Richard Nixon. #goldmanthemovie

Ominous swelling strings as Penn Central goes bust. #goldmanthemovie

but it's pretty small beer compared to previous crises and "within a couple of years it was OK". #goldmanthemovie

TALKING HED CULTURE MOMENT: "the one constant for this firm is healthy paranoia" #goldmanthemovie (then spoilt the impact by going "in a culture where you feel protected and embraced")

Dark end to part 4 as Gus Levy literally worked himself to death #goldmanthemovie

Part 5: "Takeoff" into the 1980s with a montage of CEOs #goldmanthemovie

Oh no, it's 1976. "The chemistry of their personalities" for the two co-CEOs #goldmanthemovie

I am guessing there isn't much business stuff to talk about in this bit as they've digressed for a long background about the guys' war record.

JOHN WHITEHEAD CODIFIED OUR CULTURE: says our friendly talking head. "Totally incorruptible" #goldmanthemovie

As well as the PE ratio and block trading, Goldman Sachs invented the team #goldmanthemovie

NIELL FEREGUSONN KLAXON: Goldman became respectable, after all these years, by defending bad companies against hostile takeovers #goldmanthemovie

Part 6 will be "Going Global" ...

but before that, we have "Our most valuable asset is our reputation and if we lose that it can never be recovered", which is falsified by the entire rest of the movie #goldmanthemovie

talking head tells us that this bit will be a "story of evolution" and globalisation and such like yawwwwwwwwwwwwn #goldmanthemovie

the berlin wall falls and more captions are shown. Potential false move in business terms as GS uses archive footage of Tiannamen? Also"a scientist in England invented the World Wide Web" #goldmanthemovie

NEIL FERGRUSEN KLAXON! quality smoke blowing as he just goes on and on about how GS won so many privatisations, so damn many privatisations. #goldmanthemovie

"Well you see, what we did is that we decided we wanted to get the business, and then I started flying to London and having meetings in London and that is how we got the deal". thanks dude #goldmanthemovie

as well as the PE ratio, block trading and the team, Goldman Sachs invented Europe.

And now it is "diversity time". Apparently it is not just the right thing to do, it is also good for business. #goldmanthemovie.

the 1987 crash, and GS makes a very very big deal out of what great guys they were to stand by their underwriting commitment #goldmanthemovie

Warren Buffett dialling up the folksy here

CULTURE MOMENT KIDS Robert Rubin saying that you mustn't be complacent

Robert Rubin is apparently going to bring "a deep understanding of trading risk", whatever the opposite of foreshadowing is. Oh god help us the next bit is going to be about back office. #goldmanthemovie

as well as the PE ratio, block trading, teams and Europe, Goldman Sachs invented Fischer Black. #goldmanthemovie

Are they even going to mention it? We're now five minutes into "Bob Rubin is the first guy who really deeply understood risk".

Apparently not. On to Part 7 - "Going Public". #goldmanthemovie theme is apparently that this didn't change anything and we're a really strong partnership

this is really self-indulgent stuff of almost no interest to anyone outside GS. We get it, doing your IPO was a big deal for you. For me it was a Tuesday. #goldmanthemovie

more interesting bit now, as Paulson speaks fairly honestly about how close to the edge GS came in the 1994 bond market crisis #goldmanthemovie

aaaaaand back to Jon Corzine explaining, at length, what an IPO is and why you do one. Apparently the business needs capital to grow #goldmanthemovie

Ten minutes into this thing and they're still going on about how the IPO didn't change their culture at all.

NAILL FREGUSORN KLAXON: it apparently "still feels like a partnership" #goldmanthemovie

CULTURE MOMENT: talking hed says that the Partner title still matters a lot and makes them all more collaborative

Part 8 (of ten!) "Around the World". Is this just a repeat of "Going Global"? #goldmanthemovie

yeezus, it's still "the old partnership ideals - that still pertains!" (Blankfein).

The momentum has totally been lost in this film; it's just becoming a list of business things interspersed with people saying "but the culture didn't change" #goldmanthemovie