Thread by @PalmerReport

Palmer Report is live-tweeting the #DemDebate in the replies to this tweet, starting right now. Join us.

Here we go. Twelve people on stage together for no apparent reason. Beats having to do this two nights in a row.

To give you an idea of how many of these people should have already dropped out, Andrew Yang – who has literally zero chance at the nomination - is polling in sixth place. Everyone below him is just delaying the inevitable.

As a reminder while you're watching this debate tonight, Donald Trump is being impeached, and Rudy Giuliani is being indicted.

Joe Biden hasn't fallen in the polls. It's just that Elizabeth Warren has climbed so much, she's caught him. She's been taking support from Bernie and other candidates. This is in danger of becoming a two person race.

First moderator to bring up the fake Hunter Biden scandal tonight is a rotten egg. If any of these Democratic candidates try to pretend the fake Biden scandal is real, they should fall through a trap door.

This is (I think) the second 2020 presidential debate to be moderated by an openly gay person. That's progress.

If it weren't for this debate, I'd be watching NCIS right now. Ziva's alive again, you know.

What, are they saving Biden for after the commercial break?

Aw hell, Bernie's voice is going already. This guy can't catch a break lately.

Bernie actually looks healthier now than just before his heart attack. I'm not a doctor.

Meanwhile back at Trump's White House...

Cory Booker looks like he's surprised to be here.

Trump hasn't tweeted anything about the debate yet, which means he's probably passed out somewhere.

I really like Amy Klobuchar. She has no chance at the nomination.

I just ate dinner at my desk for like the twentieth straight day.

Every question so far has been some variation of "Trump is in freefall, this is actually somehow terrible for the Democrats."

Pete Buttigieg is America's mayor. Rudy Giuliani is America's traitor.

Attention Tulsi Gabbard: you're on the wrong stage. The republican debate is next week.

Tom Steyer is here? Shit.

At least Andrew Yang isn't trying to bribe the audience with cash tonight.

Hi I'm Beto O'Rourke and I've aged twenty years since last summer.

Here comes the loaded question for Joe Biden.

Come on, Anderson Cooper, you're better than this.

Moderator: hey Bernie, do you want to defend Joe Biden against the fake scandal?

Bernie: nah, here's my stump speech.

In football news, the Rams have traded for Ramsey, which is about as confusing as trying to decipher a Donald Trump tweet storm.

Elizabeth Warren just mentally crossed Pete Buttigieg off her running mate short list.

Bernie Sanders is now explaining that his magic wand policies can overcome math.

There are only four candidates on camera now. Did the other eight go home?

"Silver tsunami"

Tulsi Gabbard is trending because she's awful.

Bernie Sanders is over there doing the hokey pokey while Joe Biden is talking.

It took Bernie a half hour before he started attacking the Democrats.

Andrew Yang is wearing a "math" pin. I assume he's trolling Donald Trump, who can't do math. The difficulty: Donald Trump can't read the pin, because he also can't read.

Meanwhile, Rudy Giuliani just announced he no longer has a lawyer because he doesn't need one. Next he'll claim he no longer has a brain because he doesn't need one of those either.

palmerreport.com/analysis/i-do-…

Julián Castro's internal monologue right now: "Don't call Biden old, don't call Biden old, don't call Biden old..."

The Democrats are debating self driving trucks. Meanwhile the Republicans are debating which of them will get to drive the truck around the prison yard.

I saw "Cashman" trending and just assumed Andrew Yang was trying to bribe voters with money again.

Apparently everyone is friends with Andrew Yang.

Cory Booker just correctly used the phrase "sectoral bargaining." Donald Trump frequently misspells two letter words.

Suzanne Vega just liked one of my tweets in this thread. I should quit while I'm ahead.

Someone give Tom Steyer his participation trophy so he can go home.

I dozed off for five minutes at my desk and I didn't miss a thing.

Hi I'm Pete Buttigieg and I've killed terrorists with my bare hands.

This #DemocraticDebate has had a surprising amount of discussion about motor vehicles.

Shut up Tulsi Gabbard. Just shut up.

Tulsi Gabbard: I'd like Elizabeth Warren to join me in supporting my incoherent pro-Assad bullshit.

Elizabeth Warren: What the fuck are you talking about?

I just thought I saw Joe Biden refer to Bernie Sanders as "Vladimir Putin" before the two of them hugged. I must have taken some really bad acid during the bathroom break.

Moderator: why are you even here?

Tom Steyer: I have no idea.

Trump hasn't tweeted once during this debate. He's too busy trying to figure out how to feed Rudy Giuliani to the alligators.

Did Tulsi Gabbard fall through a trap door yet?

Beto and Mayor Pete are arguing over who has the better haircut or something. Time for a bathroom break.

So far nothing that's happened in this debate will change the polls in any way. But at least people are being educated on the issues.

I'm not saying Joe Biden is bored with this debate, but I just saw him hold his finger over above his lip and pretend he has a mustache.

Tulsi Gabbard: pull my finger.

Democrats: no.

Why does Tulsi Gabbard keep asking Elizabeth Warren in particular to get behind her insane pro-Assad proposals? It's almost as if Gabbard is following a script that someone gave her.

Moderator: should we break up the major tech companies?

Elizabeth Warren: Yes.

Andrew Yang: No.

Tom Steyer: I vote "present."

If you think there are too many people on this stage, there are seven more Democrats running who DIDN'T make it to the stage.

Why is everyone trying to get Elizabeth Warren to join them in calling for something?

WHY IS THIS DEBATE SO FUCKING LONG?

Meanwhile, Rudy Giuliani just got caught trying to kidnap a guy in Pennsylvania and ship him off to Turkey, after Michael Flynn got caught trying to do the same thing: palmerreport.com/analysis/lates…

This debate is like the Energizer Bunny. It just keeps going and going and going...

Thanks for following along. Here are Palmer Report's big winners and losers in tonight's debate: palmerreport.com/analysis/winne…