A thread rating the jockeys in every horse racing emoji:
Google, Android 10.0
Soft hands, eyes up, nice line from bit to elbow. Rider has slipped into a chair seat, likely because he is riding without stirrups. If horse stops he will fall. Saddle slipped back, poor fit? 5/10
Google, Android 10.0
Soft hands, eyes up, nice line from bit to elbow. Rider has slipped into a chair seat, likely because he is riding without stirrups. If horse stops he will fall. Saddle slipped back, poor fit? 5/10
Apple, iOS 13.2
This jockey has risen from the saddle appropriately, and is wisely using stirrups & helmet with chin harness. Reins are between thumb and forefinger, instead of between the third and fourth fingers. As a result, horse can easily bolt. Dangerous on the track. 3/10
This jockey has risen from the saddle appropriately, and is wisely using stirrups & helmet with chin harness. Reins are between thumb and forefinger, instead of between the third and fourth fingers. As a result, horse can easily bolt. Dangerous on the track. 3/10
Microsoft, Windows 10, May 2019 update
Jockey appears to have confused a racing seat with bowing in prayer. Riding over the kidneys and loin, rather than the lumbar region, will cause sore back. Helmet unsafe, no chinstrap. Maybe he's praying not to fall off? No fingers. 0/10
Jockey appears to have confused a racing seat with bowing in prayer. Riding over the kidneys and loin, rather than the lumbar region, will cause sore back. Helmet unsafe, no chinstrap. Maybe he's praying not to fall off? No fingers. 0/10
Samsung, One UI 1.5
Surprised to see a red hunt coat on the track; these are reserved for foxhunting. Horse is tripping and has gone to its knees. Rider's fetal position and deathgrip on the reins will lead to a forward rotational fall. High risk of catastrophic injury. -10/10
Surprised to see a red hunt coat on the track; these are reserved for foxhunting. Horse is tripping and has gone to its knees. Rider's fetal position and deathgrip on the reins will lead to a forward rotational fall. High risk of catastrophic injury. -10/10
WhatsApp 2.19.244
Again a jockey holding the reins in the fists, which is unsafe & incorrect. Rider looking down, will not see hazards ahead. Toes pointed down. In event of a fall, this jockey's feet will go through the stirrup. You don't want to be dragged by a racehorse. -5/10
Again a jockey holding the reins in the fists, which is unsafe & incorrect. Rider looking down, will not see hazards ahead. Toes pointed down. In event of a fall, this jockey's feet will go through the stirrup. You don't want to be dragged by a racehorse. -5/10
Twitter, Twemoji 12.2
This jockey's garishly long arms are causing several equitation faults. His back is roached, affecting both horse and rider's ability to balance. Weight is much too far back in the saddle. Send back to lessons. Needs no-stirrup work on the longe line. 2/10
This jockey's garishly long arms are causing several equitation faults. His back is roached, affecting both horse and rider's ability to balance. Weight is much too far back in the saddle. Send back to lessons. Needs no-stirrup work on the longe line. 2/10
Facebook emoji 4.0
Heels down! Good! Points for safety goggles and approved helmet. Line from bit to elbow is broken, interfering with contact. To make matters worse, the horse has blinders but no bridle. Did horse lose his tail in an accident due to this unsafe riding? 3/10
Heels down! Good! Points for safety goggles and approved helmet. Line from bit to elbow is broken, interfering with contact. To make matters worse, the horse has blinders but no bridle. Did horse lose his tail in an accident due to this unsafe riding? 3/10
Joypixels 5.0
Saddle has 3 girths instead of stirrups. Reins held about 6" from the bit, requiring rider to bend so low he is in danger of nose injury if the horse raises its head suddenly. Horse is a saint for not bucking, rear girth is interfering with its genitals. -100/10
Saddle has 3 girths instead of stirrups. Reins held about 6" from the bit, requiring rider to bend so low he is in danger of nose injury if the horse raises its head suddenly. Horse is a saint for not bucking, rear girth is interfering with its genitals. -100/10
OpenMoji 12.0
They went through 12 release versions and still ended up with this? Kudos for attempting bareback & bridleless riding on the racetrack, and rider has a solid center of gravity, but floating head risks spooking other horses. Should be barred from the track. 2/10
They went through 12 release versions and still ended up with this? Kudos for attempting bareback & bridleless riding on the racetrack, and rider has a solid center of gravity, but floating head risks spooking other horses. Should be barred from the track. 2/10
Emojidex 1.0.34
Saddlecloth OVER saddle, rather than under, probably explains why horse appears to be rank. Though that could be because bridle is sliding over its eyes. Rider needs to sit up straight and look up or he is going to slide off the back. Where's the bit? 3/10
Saddlecloth OVER saddle, rather than under, probably explains why horse appears to be rank. Though that could be because bridle is sliding over its eyes. Rider needs to sit up straight and look up or he is going to slide off the back. Where's the bit? 3/10
Messenger 1.0
Excuse me, sir, in lieu of a bridle you seem to have attached a dog harness to your horse's head. Entire apparatus will slide off if horse raises head. Jockey actually well-balanced, especially given lack of stirrups, but should not wear mittens to ride. 4/10
Excuse me, sir, in lieu of a bridle you seem to have attached a dog harness to your horse's head. Entire apparatus will slide off if horse raises head. Jockey actually well-balanced, especially given lack of stirrups, but should not wear mittens to ride. 4/10
LG G5
Riding in a racing seat is tiring due to absorbing the horse's oscillation, but you can't rest your entire upper body on the horse's withers and expect him to perform. Not ready to gallop without stirrups. Rider appears to be in pain. Try a Centered Riding workshop. 1/10
Riding in a racing seat is tiring due to absorbing the horse's oscillation, but you can't rest your entire upper body on the horse's withers and expect him to perform. Not ready to gallop without stirrups. Rider appears to be in pain. Try a Centered Riding workshop. 1/10
HTC Sense 7
What track is allowing an extremely large infant in a onesie to breeze an eyeless horse? Troubling lack of basic safety protocol at this facility. If you have a horse here, I suggest moving them immediately. This animal CANNOT have passed a gate test. -50/10
What track is allowing an extremely large infant in a onesie to breeze an eyeless horse? Troubling lack of basic safety protocol at this facility. If you have a horse here, I suggest moving them immediately. This animal CANNOT have passed a gate test. -50/10
Firefox OS 2.5
I rather like this cheerful rider who is sitting up straight and looking forward, with nice contact on the reins. However, lack of stirrups led to a three-point seat rather than a racing seat. Maybe just starting this colt? Not ready to race, but good effort. 6/10
I rather like this cheerful rider who is sitting up straight and looking forward, with nice contact on the reins. However, lack of stirrups led to a three-point seat rather than a racing seat. Maybe just starting this colt? Not ready to race, but good effort. 6/10
