@SwiftOnSecurity It’s a little bit of a twisted tale, as no doubt most “chainsaw covered in blood” stories are.
On this past Christmas Eve, two burglars targeted my home while we were gone.
On this past Christmas Eve, two burglars targeted my home while we were gone.
@SwiftOnSecurity We had a newer home, and the window frames are made of vinyl.
So one of the burglars had a theory. If he heated up a knife, he could sink it through the frame and unlock the window from the outside.
So one of the burglars had a theory. If he heated up a knife, he could sink it through the frame and unlock the window from the outside.
@SwiftOnSecurity He tried this, and it didn’t work as well as he thought it would. 
@SwiftOnSecurity In the process of attempting this, he cut himself badly and started bleeding profusely.
@SwiftOnSecurity The other burglar broke into my outside shed and grabbed my chainsaw. He brought it to the back porch.
Now, this isn’t some homeowner chainsaw. I grew up in northwest rural Oregon. This is a 1984 Stihl logger chainsaw that my dad bought new to work up in the woods felling trees.
Now, this isn’t some homeowner chainsaw. I grew up in northwest rural Oregon. This is a 1984 Stihl logger chainsaw that my dad bought new to work up in the woods felling trees.
@SwiftOnSecurity I could sink the entire bar through this pile of logs and it wouldn’t flinch.
@SwiftOnSecurity But there is only one problem with this chainsaw, other than it’s heavy as crap.
It is super hard to start. Always has been, since day 1 in 1984, my dad claims.
It is super hard to start. Always has been, since day 1 in 1984, my dad claims.
@SwiftOnSecurity So burglar 2 is trying to start this chainsaw and burglar 1 is cutting his hand. And eventually burglar 1 goes over to 2 and takes over.
Now blood is flying everywhere. It gets all over the top of the chainsaw.
Now blood is flying everywhere. It gets all over the top of the chainsaw.
@SwiftOnSecurity They never did get the chainsaw started. But they did break in, steal all my computers and tablets, and in order to cover their tracks set the entire house on fire.
@SwiftOnSecurity Firefighters got the blaze out. The chainsaw was still on the back porch, and the sheriff found blood elsewhere as well. The two perps are in jail facing 20 years each and we are back in our home after 5 months of restoration construction. The end. ❤️
@SwiftOnSecurity My kids had been making LEGO creations the day before. This is what was left of them.
@SwiftOnSecurity The night before the burglary, in the same spot the fire was set.
@SwiftOnSecurity The day we moved back in. Happy family!
@SwiftOnSecurity There's a lot more to this story, but my wife was patiently waiting for me at IKEA where we were buying replacement furniture for our rec room (above) and I didn't want to keep her waiting too much. 😅
@SwiftOnSecurity Example: just a few weeks ago one of the arsonists made a shiv and apparently tried to get to the other in jail.
