Profile picture
European Briton #FBPE @EuropeanBriton
, 17 tweets, 8 min read Read on Twitter
Thread 1/15 So you want to cash in big on #Brexit?

Here’s how.

Disclaimer. The following thread does not constitute financial advice. Before making any investment you should consult a professional financial adviser.
Just satire.
2/15 Now let’s suppose you have a spare £100m.

The first thing you need to do is invest it in non-Sterling denominated assets.

@Jacob_Rees_Mogg ‘s firm has a few funds, all investing $8.4billion in such assets, so ask him if you’re not sure.

He knows all about this.
3/15 For the sake of illustration, let’s make up an imaginary currency called the Wonga.

And let’s suppose that you get 2 Wongas to the Pound. W2=£1. The rate doesn’t matter.

So now you’ve got W200million in stocks denominated in Wonga currency.
4/15 Now what you need is a #Brexit. Any Brexit will do, but the harder and more damaging to the value of Sterling, the better.

Sterling fell from €1.30 in June 16 to €1.08 in August 17, a 17% fall, and at that point nothing had really changed.

No-deal is the best.
5/15 Who knows what a no-deal Brexit might bring. If you’re really lucky the pound could go into free fall and you’ll be laughing all the way to the bank.

But let’s not be too greedy, and just assume a 20% fall.

So now, where £1 used to by 2 Wongas, now it only buys 1.6 Wonga.
6/15 But don’t worry, because your money’s already in Wongas!

As Sterling falls, your Wonga assets are going up relatively speaking. A 20% fall in Sterling means 1 Wonga was worth 50p, but is now worth 62.5p!

So your W200million stocks overnight are now worth £125Million!
7/15 Unbelievable but true!

A 20% fall in the value of Sterling makes your Wonga denominated stocks (and every other currency) worth 25% more *overnight*!

Fantastic news isn’t it!

So much easier than running a real business to make an honest profit any day!
8/15 Now remember though.

The harder the #Brexit the better, and a no-deal #Brexit is best by far, as there’s more chance of a sterling free fall...
9/15 ...and when sterling’s got to the bottom, then’s the time to sell your Wonga stocks back for Sterling and cash in your profit.

Don’t forget, a 20% fall in Sterling means you’ll be 25% better off in £ afterwards.

A 50% fall *doubles* your money!!!
10/15 And by this time all stocks in British companies will be dirt cheap and you can fill your boots ready for the recovery.

It may take a while mind.
11/15 But while you’re waiting, just find the next large economy that’s worried about immigration, and find a way to crash it too. Italy’s looking like a strong opportunity?

Finding an ally who’s not frightened to spread racist propaganda will help.
12/15 You’ll be pleasantly surprised how many members of the public will be willing to help you with your #Brexit plan!

And even @UKLabour!

Much easier & quicker than making sound long term investment judgements.

And it’s great fun watching politicians wringing their hands.
13/15 But if you don’t have £100m to spare,

if you’re more worried about 4 millions UK export jobs that rely on friction free exports to the EU,

or the cost of your summer holiday abroad,

maybe a #Brexit get rich quick scheme is not for you.

If so, sign up for a #PeoplesVote.
14/15 @Nigel_Farage @Jacob_Rees_Mogg @Arron_banks

Have I missed anything?

Nigel watching pound fall on referendum night.
15/15 Oh by the way, don’t go retweeting this. We don’t want everyone knowing, because a #Brexit bringing down a whole country’s economy for financial gain could be tantamount to treason.

So if anyone asks, just blame your no deal Brexit on EU intransigence.

Good luck!
@mrjamesob @Andrew_Adonis @mikegalsworthy
Anyone living in UK with large sums invested in non-Sterling assets will be delighted with a no-deal #Brexit.

Immediate windfall benefit rises exponentially with size of fall in £ Sterling.

@Jacob_Rees_Mogg is one of many similar.
So here’s how to get rich quick with #Brexit.

(Assuming like some members of the #Brexit syndicate you’ve got £100m or so going spare that is).

Missing some Tweet in this thread?
You can try to force a refresh.

Like this thread? Get email updates or save it to PDF!

Subscribe to European Briton #FBPE
Profile picture

Get real-time email alerts when new unrolls are available from this author!

This content may be removed anytime!

Twitter may remove this content at anytime, convert it as a PDF, save and print for later use!

Try unrolling a thread yourself!

how to unroll video

1) Follow Thread Reader App on Twitter so you can easily mention us!

2) Go to a Twitter thread (series of Tweets by the same owner) and mention us with a keyword "unroll" @threadreaderapp unroll

You can practice here first or read more on our help page!

Did Thread Reader help you today?

Support us! We are indie developers!

This site is made by just three indie developers on a laptop doing marketing, support and development! Read more about the story.

Become a Premium Member and get exclusive features!

Premium member ($3.00/month or $30.00/year)

Too expensive? Make a small donation by buying us coffee ($5) or help with server cost ($10)

Donate via Paypal Become our Patreon

Thank you for your support!