Thread by @tijesuoresanya

A conversation that ended with ‘You’re Mad’

The festive period is upon us. Stay safe, stay woke!

A very long thread!

@DrJoeAbah @OgbeniDipo @SubDeliveryZone @deyimikami

Lagos, Nigeria.

I was working at my desk this Wednesday morning when a call came on my phone with the caller ID 0814 850 4919. The caller said he was calling from ‘my bank’ and that my bank verification number (BVN) details had some discrepancies.

As a professional in the finance industry, I knew I was in for a good laugh so I decided to play along. I mean, this was someone that obviously wanted to rip me off my money, so why not rip him off his airtime?

I activated the speaker of my phone and signalled to my colleagues to rally round my desk and join in the fun too. “Sir, the year of birth on your BVN differs from what we have on our system.” His voice was cool, calm and professional.

“Which of my banks?” I asked, deliberately not falling into the unspecific “your bank” trap.“UBA,” he replied.I had never stepped into any UBA branch all my life.“Oh, I didn’t know about this issue. I haven’t used the account in a while"

“I see. Someone is also trying to open an account in First Bank with your BVN.” He rattled off the numbers and they were correct.This was getting interesting.“Was this you?” he asked.

“No!” I replied, trying to infuse as much panic as I could into my voice.“I suspected as much, because the name of the person is Chukwu…”“Please help me stop the intruder immediately.” More panic into my voice.

I imagined him leaning back into his seat, smiling, thinking, This one is in.He pushed harder. “What other account do you have with the same BVN?”“Just Diamond Bank— my salary account.”

This time, I imagined him sitting up, his back straight, ears jutted out like a rabbit’s. It was the beginning of a new month after all; my account would still be very much breathing.

“Ha, you will soon have problems with your salary account if the BVN issue is not resolved. I can see from here that you have two different dates of birth.” He quoted my correct DOB and then a second one, which was almost correct except for the year!

“Thank you so much for calling me. Please help me resolve this issue as soon as possible. I will find time to go to Diamond Bank today.”“Oh, there is no need for that, I can resolve for both from my desk.”

“Really? How can you resolve Diamond Bank’s issue from UBA?” I asked, putting awe into my voice.“Actually…l don’t work specifically in UBA. I work with the BVN General Office.”

Okay…I was wondering. All the same, thanks for your willingness to help with both banks.”“Oh, it’s no problem, I’m just doing my job,” he replied. “Do you have an ATM card for the Diamond Bank account.”

I reminded him that was my salary account, yes, I did have an ATM card. He asked for the serial number (which even an IT student in the bank would appropriately call PAN). I let that slide and told him it wasn’t safe for me to give such information.

He reassured me that it was just to resolve the BVN issue. So I gave him a random 16-digit number and the expiry date—02/2019. Dude was happy! I could picture his gang members dancing shaku shaku!

He went on further to ask for the numbers on the reverse side of the card. Again, I gave him some random number and ensured that I had all these written down so I can give them the same thing no matter how many times they asked (if they were smart enough).

He told me to hold on as it would take some minutes to correct the issue and also link my BVN to both accounts so I could be able to use the Diamond Bank debit card also on the UBA account (nice innovation you would say, right?)

Of course, he thought he had it all, so he ended the call. My colleagues and I couldn’t contain our laughter as we waited for him to call back. I was 100% sure he would call back, because I was too real to him for the transaction to fail and we had spoken for over 17 minutes.

About 2 minutes later, he called back and told me there was something wrong with my debit card as he was unable to connect to Diamond Bank. I called out all the numbers for him again and told him to please try again as I couldn’t afford to have restrictions on my salary account.

He told me to hold on and ended the call again. At this point, I expected they should’ve known I was playing them but no, the fools really wanted to have me for lunch.

Less than 2 minutes later, a call from another number, 0906 946 4988, came in. The caller said he was the manager and they were having serious issues with the details I provided.

I told him I had the card right there before me and so I couldn’t have been wrong about the details. I suggested that I could come to their office to show them if he would give me an address. That was when they knew they have been fooled.

“We don’t need you in our office,” Manager yelled.“Why don’t you come around to my office then?” “You are mad! He yelled and hung up. Laughter rang out in the office.

While this may be funny, these guys have wiped off countless people’s accounts. A lot of questions though: How did my BVN, name and DOB get into their hands?

Most people would have fallen for this, because they provided correct details about me, but that didn’t make them genuine. Someone could think, at least they didn’t ask for my PIN, so they can’t have access to my funds. To be continued

Really? Please be informed that there are some ‘card not present‘ transactions that do not require PIN.

So here are some safety tips:
1. Your card details should be known only to you.
2. Never input your card details on any website that you do not trust.
3. When making card payments online, always ensure the website is secured by watching out for the ‘https’ or golden padlock.

4.That a person provides an information only your banker should know doesn’t confirm he is your banker
5.Your bank will never ask for your PAN. If u must give out that details, use the masked PAN format, e.g. 539639******4646 with only the first 6 and the last 4 digits visible.

6.Your bank will not ask for the CVV or CVC (the 3-digit number on the reverse side of your bank)

I’ll advise you more as I remember.

#StaySafeStayWoke

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