Screw it, let’s start passing laws making membership in the Republican Party a felony.
I mean if we’re playing the mean-spirited destructively hostile unconstitutional laws game, then let’s play.

Voters who belong to country clubs and homeowners associations are purged. They can re-register on Labor Day in a Planned Parenthood. From 5:00am to 5:45am.
If you want to itemize on an income of over $500k, you have to pass a drug screen. Every month. Fine of 75% of previous year’s annual income if you fail one.
If you employ staff who work in your home, you have to get a weekly affidavit from them that you’re paying a living wage and present it, in person, at a downtown municipal building, to a skeptical case worker who handles 5000 others.

We can play this game, Republicans.
Traditional Biblical definition of marriage? Fine. But no half-measures. Let’s nullify all straight marriages whose ceremonies didn’t incorporate the proper animal sacrifices. To get remarried you have to prove yourself ceremonially clean. No exceptions, Pence.
While we’re at it, traditional Biblical definition of debt. Full debt forgiveness every seven years. All property rights annulled every 50th year, which is an entire year of paid vacation. Come on Christians, line up for some Bible.
Man, weird you don’t hear Christians talking about traditional biblical definition of debt, amirite.
If you claim federal personal income deductions over $250k, or you have any holdings in foreign banks, or you have capital gains over $250k, you will be audited. We’ll hire thousands of auditors. We’ll call this The America Jobs America Jobs Act (AJAJA)
Wealthy people have far more power and influence and ability to misuse both than poor people so, yet we treat poor people as if they are the ones who need oversight.

Why?

Let’s reverse who receives our wariness and skepticism.

We can play this game, Republicans.
I started out joking but most of these seem pretty good; I’m talking myself into them.
This thread is my platform in 2020. #VoteGoat
OK, if they don’t ask me to host the Oscars I’m running for President. Avenatti dropping out creates an opportunity in the Unqualified Lunatic space. #VoteGoat2020
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