Thread by @johnmoe

I've been thinking about how people are supposed to live with depression when it's a chronic thing that is managed but persistent. And I think it's like having a chimp in your kitchen. I'll explain.

So in this scenario, your life is a restaurant, the kitchen is your mind, and the chef is you and your conscious mind. Your job with the restaurant is to make things and get them out to the customers/world.

The dishes that you are to prepare are things like caring about others, doing your work job, taking care of yourself, be aware of your community, etc. You have to get those orders out to the tables so that you have a functional, prosperous restaurant.

The problem is that there's this chimp in the restaurant. The chimp is locked in the kitchen with you. And you can't just kick the chimp out. The chimp won't leave. The chimp has some sort of historical landmark designation. The chimp is depression.

And it's like, shit, it's hard enough getting all these orders out to the tables as it is! Other chefs don't have to deal with a chimp on top of all of it! (Well, more of them have kitchen chimps than you'd think). The chimp is a troublemaker.

The chimp steals your utensils, your pots and pans, your ingredients, your chef hat, as well as sauces, garnishes, and sometimes entire table-ready meals. Then you have to scour everywhere to find where the chimp has put everything. And those orders are due up!

Sometimes, the chimp sleeps for a while. The pills seem to help with that.

So the best thing to do? Slow down service. People need to wait a few more minutes for their food. And use that time to really get to know that chimp. Follow the chimp. Write things down. Learn your kitchen chimp's pattern.

And that's when you learn the difference between what you can control and what the chimp is doing to you. You learn that the paring knife will always get hidden behind the mixer. You learn how to head off the theft of that curry dish. You lose stuff but now you recover it too.

Eventually, I think, I'm not there yet but I'm working on it, your kitchen runs okay because you know your kitchen chimp and its tricks and lies.
The wait staff knows about the chimp and mention to customers "Our chef has a kitchen chimp." And it's fine.

Some customers will say, "Oh, I don't believe in kitchen chimps" or "Maybe if the chef smiled more, he wouldn't have such a kitchen chimp." Those customers are thrown bodily from the establishment, their meal thrown at them on the way.

Okay. That's all. Learn that chimp. /end