Profile picture
John Bull
@garius
, 4 tweets, 1 min read Read on Twitter
<Curtain goes up. Single Spot. Keir Starmer is centre stage>

Yesterday
All our troubles seemed so far away
Now we’re further from majori-tay
Oh, I believe in yesterday

Suddenly
There go Coffey, Gapes and Chis Leslie
Two types of ‘shuka’, Berger, Smith MP
Oh TIG was formed today
Why they had to go? Well I know
Don’t like to say
John McDonnell’s wrong
It was party puri-tay

Yesterday
Labour felt like second fam-i-lay
Now Young Labour shouts of trait’rous ways
Oh, I believe in yesterday
Why they had to go? Well I know
Don’t like to say
John McDonnell’s wrong
It was party puri-tay

Yesterday
Labour felt like second fam-i-lay
Now I need a place to hide away
Oh, I believed in yesterday

<exits stage, slowly and sadly>
Not a Brexit Adventure. More Brexit-adjacent. But if you like that sort of thing my Brexit adventures start way back here:

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More from @garius see all

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John Bull
@garius
JAVID: Hello PM! The Saj is... Oh. Phil. Shouldn't you be in China?
HAMMOND: Yes, but Gavin's been reading Biggles comics again.
JAVID: Bugger. He doesn't learn.
HAMMOND: This time he fucking will.

<Gavin's office>

WILLIAMSON: My Space Marines! Who broke all my Space Marines?!
HAMMOND: Speaking of pointless posturing, how's your war on pregnant sixteen year olds going?
JAVID: Ha bloody ha. The Saj will not be seen to compromise on security!
HAMMOND:
JAVID: Anyway, she's nineteen now and has had the baby.
HAMMOND: Oh that makes it so much better, sure.
HAMMOND: Hello all. I'll be chairing Cabinet today as the PM is in Brussels and David is... busy

<St Stephens Pub>

SOUBRY: It's so nice. It feels... sorry, but there's a man in a trenchcoat watching us through a newspaper
GREENING: It's just Lidington. He's my tail, apparently.
Read 14 tweets
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John Bull
@garius
Just in case you're wondering roughly what a £161k website looks like.

(h/t to @BBCTomEdwards for the Garden Bridge Trust cost breakdowns)
@BBCTomEdwards Good news is that apparently gets you about 12 pages.

So that's only about 13k a page.

Bargain!
@BBCTomEdwards Built by Wilson Fletcher, if the source code is to be believed.

wilsonfletcher.com
Read 4 tweets
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John Bull
@garius
BTW, SERIOUS LONDON RAILWAY MOMENT: if you're wondering what Grayling's next tour-de-force screw will be IRL, then ask yourself this:

"Shouldn't they have awarded the Southeastern Franchise by now?"
The answer, of course is 'Yes Mr Bull they should. What's the hold up?'

Well it TURNS OUT that if you as a Department for Transport, tell bidders they have to shoulder the risk if your passenger number forecasts turn out to be bollocks post-Brexit, they tend to tell you to F-off
Of course if this had been thought about at the time, it could have been worded into the bidding. OR.. if the Sec State was prepared to accept that the DfT have to shoulder the risk, then it wouldn't be a problem.

But they didn't. And he won't.
Read 7 tweets

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Rebecca Vallas
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The countdown to tonight’s #SOTU goat rodeo feels like a good time for a refresher on who the “Trump economy” is working for (folks with multiple yachts)....

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『
Jin Love Yourself Concert Program book translation thread
』
Q. New tour ‘LOVE YOURSELF’ is starting. What thought came to your mind after tour was confirmed?
A. Recently watching ‘Burn the stage’, joyful memories of last tour started to recall to my mind. What kind of memories in what places would I make this time? How louder would fans
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ike ntanzi
@ikentanzi_
The Phrase "an eye for an eye" wasn't invented to not be used. Even at this day an age, there are people who very much believe and use this phrase to do exactly what it says... An eye, for an eye.

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For some of you who don't know what this saying means, well we can do this both ways, that is, yo take u to the bible scripture that talks about the origin of thus saying, or I could briefly explain it to you in my own words. Okay, no . I'm choosing to go the bible route.
According to Bible scripture,the meaning of "Eye for an Eye" is that a person who has been injured by another person must return the offending action to the originator. In simple words,it means Revenge.And y'all know what they say about revenge,its a bitch so I've heard 😂😂...
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Marco Rogers
@polotek
Can we stop doing this snarky sarcastic shit while the president is leading us towards authoritarianism and war. You're a fucking Senator. Call it what it is. Then fix it.
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