Thread by @JYSexton

Today is the release date of my new book THE MAN THEY WANTED ME TO BE. Its an analysis of toxic masculinity as a plague on America and its people, and if you enjoy this feed and my work I hope you'll consider picking it up. 1/

amazon.com/gp/product/164…

It's a book about how traditional masculinity as our culture knows it is unnatural and hurtful to men, women, and society at large. Men are taught to pretend to be invincible and believe something is wrong with them, and so they lash out at the world. 2/

As a result, men live shorter lives, women and vulnerable populations are discriminated against and made to live in fear, and society as a whole is held back from progressing and bettering itself. 3/

This is part of what led to Donald Trump and our current political climate. In an effort to pretend to be uncaring and strong, men oppose social programs, ignore climate change, purposefully oppose education. They throw their weight behind pathetic figures like Trump. 4/

In this way, the MAGA movement is powered by toxic masculinity, it's a gathering of insecure men who want to pretend like they're not scared of how the world is changing and so they clothe themselves in transparent anger and shows of "strength." 5/

This has led to a surge in extremist groups, including the alt-right, the KKK, and neo-Nazi outfits. I talked to veterans of these groups and they rely on insecure white men who want to feel tough and powerful. They radicalize them just like ISIS. 6/

It's also led to a spate of mass shootings by men who are racked with toxic masculinity and insecurity. They pick up guns as a means to power and they believe violence and murder are the only means left to them to assert their dominance. 7/

In addition, these men who suffer from toxic masculinity isolate themselves, live terribly depressing lives, kill themselves in alarming numbers, and are dying despair deaths. In the meantime, they take their anger out on women by assaulting, raping, and subjugating them. 8/

It also talks about the process of socialization, how we learn these roles. To do that, I talk about my life in an abusive, rural family. How my father figures beat me and berated me until I was racked with self-loathing to the point where I wanted to die. 9/

It focuses in part on my small town where women were routinely kidnapped, tortured, and murdered, including my neighbor Pam Foddrill. It looks at women like my mother who have endured constant abuse and discrimination, stalking and violence, their entire lives. 10/

It's a political book, but it's also personal, and that's because I truly believe this American crisis is both societal and personal in nature. It's all intertwined, and we have to start dismantling the myths that prevent us from moving forward. 11/

In all, it's a book I wish I would've had as a kid. I didn't know I was alone in questioning traditional masculinity and the men I talked to wish they had as well. The truth is this is a pervasive lie and we have to address it and change it in order to stop this madness. 12/

Again, this book means a lot to me. It was exceedingly hard to write, especially digging through all the childhood trauma. But I really hope you'll give it a read and consider telling your people about it. Appreciate all the support from all corners. Really, really I do. 13/13