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May’s on stage. Here we go. Starts as she means to go on, telling us that she was aiming to build a better future. (By, er, destroying our children’s.)
May graciously admits that the Brexit process has been more complex than she anticipated. Nice try. Literally anyone who understood Brexit tried to tell her this for months and years, and she neither listened nor cared.
Oh god. ‘A new Brexit deal.’ ‘Nothing has changed’ would at least have been accurate.
Extraordinary. May pledges to put commitment in law to find alternative arrangements to backstop by December next year. Literally the equivalent of making a new law to deliver sunshine on Christmas Day. Cynicism, arrogance and total idiocy combine for the coup de grace.
May literally says that she is excited by the ‘new opportunities Brexit presents’, and Remainers and Brexiters can finally unite in total and unbridled derision
Beware the trap she sets: offering Parliament a vote on a second referendum, and asking them to vote for the bill’s second reading so they can get it. Quite literally playing all sides off against each other and hoping they’re all stupid enough to trust her.
And the final psychedelic bullshit on a ‘customs compromise’. Like a compromise on being pregnant or having a pulse. May has corroded our discourse and rendered political truth meaningless. The demise of her execrable premiership cannot come soon enough or be more richly deserved
Wait: a further, final outrage. Telling us that the future generations will have opportunities hers could never dream of. Her generation benefited from EU integration and prosperity. Ours will languish pointlessly isolated. Simply no words to convey her dishonesty or cynicism.
Reader, there is more. Even now, after three years of humiliation, capitulation and disempowerment, May claims Brexit is the tool to make us ‘independent’. Not once has she explained how we were ever a colony or why she voted to remain one. She’s the worst charlatan of them all.
Hilariously May tells journos she’s compromised. How? By offering vote on a second ref which would have been amendment anyway? By granting ‘customs arrangement’ which would have happened regardless? By making it legally compulsory to find a unicorn? What an embarrassing disgrace.
