, 6 tweets, 2 min read Read on Twitter
I’ve been praying about it and I just don’t think men are suitable for church leadership. I’m not sexist. It’s just that their uncontrollable boners are distracting to other parishioners.
Don’t get it twisted that I HATE men. I celebrate what God made us to be: a life-support system for a boner. But that’s is a sacred trust, it carries responsibility. We men have to focus on protecting our great gift. That’s why we must submit to God’s law and have zero authority.
Also, as household spiritual leader, it’s every mother’s sacred duty to protect the sanctity of their sons’ greatest gift, his boner, keeping it unspoiled for his eventual wife—and also his purity balls. That’s why good mothers give their sons promise rings on their 12th birthday
Anyway, that’s why we need to keep our lovely sacred men away from inappropriate activities like church leadership. If a “man-ister” was up there talking, all the women could think about w/b the possibility of him popping a boner. He’d be preventing them from hearing God’s word.
Really getting impatient with people saying this is a man hating thread. I adore men. But study after study shows that working makes men less happy, even if they’re paid as generously as 70% what women are, and some studies show it lowers their sperm count.

If God didn’t want men to stay at home and be protected by women, why did he put their precious boners and purity balls on the outside of their bodies? Gods design is perfect, and men can never find true fulfillment if they don’t respect that.
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