Thread by @leekern13

This is a thread I wrote a while back but never posted. I guess I felt a bit embarrassed cos it’s quite personal. I wanted to write something about Jewish pride as it had been a shitty year to be a Jew in Britain. Things seem to have reached a nadir. So sod it. Here it is...

I’m a Jew. And though there are those that hate me, I’m not defined by them. I define me.

I love being a Jew. I’m no better than anyone else & I’m no worse. But I love what I am, who I am and my crazy heart full of Jewish wonder. What is a Jewish soul? I don’t know - but mine feels Jewish. Is it any better than yours? No. Mine just feels Jewish and I’m in love with it

I didn’t grow up in a home with any spirituality & little tradition. In fact we’ve never even had a Shabbat dinner. We did do Pesach though, lit Chanukah candles & had no doubt about our tribe. My great uncle Hyman wore a magen David on his shorts when he boxed.

I was sent to cheder & then bamitzvah classes. Me & my friends were the yocky Jews who didn’t know much. But we were taught the Shema. Now I know the Shema & can say the same words that my family whose names I’ll never know said for thousands of years all the way back to Moses

I’m a secular Jew but am electrified reading the Hebrew canon. Not only do I have archeological time capsules of the Hebrew People, coins & stone, I have a literature containing the soft fossil of their living brains, their excitement & despair, as fresh as the day it was written

The most Jewish thing I do is kiss a book after I’ve finished reading it - if it has moved me. I look like a nutter on the train. This stems from being taught to kiss the siddur after closing it. The smell of siddurs reminds me of my grandpa. Perhaps in some way I’m kissing him.

Circumcision? Bring it. Yeah it’s raw, primal & savage but who wants a completely sanitised world? I come from a TRIBE of tough desert dwelling God seeking rabble rousing hoodlums. To gain something great in life sometimes you have to suffer a little pain. Which do you focus on?

Circumcision is not rational, but neither is love. In family & relationships you have esoteric traditions that bond. They’re real & they mean something even though on paper some of them make no sense. In fact, they mean MORE because rational words can’t express the feeling.

I’ve a drive that feels linked to my Jewishness. When people try to exterminate you, you work hard to beat your personal best cos it matters. But momsas don’t define me. From the burning bush onwards a desire for ecstasy, revelation & flaming truth has surely been passed down?

I like that story where Jacob wrestled with an angel all through the long dark night. And the angel mashed up his leg. But then Jacob won but wouldn’t let the angel go until the angel blessed him. Transform every shitty situation into a blessing.

And in spite of all the shit & all the crap & all my shtetl family whose names I’ll never know, gone disappeared erased from history & old Jews gunned down in Pittsburgh, pregnant women in Israel, we’ll still find a way to not let go of this life until it’s turned into a blessing

And let me say this, in spite of the constant tsoras and the ever present struggle and the threats from all angles: this is the best time to be a Jew in 2000 years...

We’re living indigenous & free in Israel again, masters of our own destiny. We will never know how vulnerable & exposed our ancestors felt in a world with nowhere to go, where the rug could always be pulled from under their feet. We will never ever truly know what that feels like

And they would be so happy for us. So no apologies to anyone that Jews are home. This is the best time to be a Jew in 2000 years. Due to Zionism - fantastic Zionism - Jewish civilisation has bloomed. If people don’t like it, tough. I can explain it to them but I don’t HAVE to...

So the truth is this hasn’t been a shitty year to be a Jew

It’s been a brilliant year

How can any Jew ever feel sad when we know the bad guys always lose?

We’ve so much to be proud of

What a great time to be alive

It always is

No antisemite or bastard will never wipe the smile off my face or the joy out of my heart