Thread by @hnshah

You’ll never make everyone happy.

So, stop trying.

Spend your energy to make yourself
happy instead.

Others will be happy because you are, not because you made them happy.

I used to confuse my own happiness with other people’s until I realized this
simple truth.

When I was trying to make others happy:

- I aimed to be the best meeting of their day
- I would meet where they wanted to
- I would discuss what they wanted to
- I would only think about how I could help them
- My self worth was tied to their positive feelings about me

When I was focused on other people’s happiness, I thought I was being selfless.

Instead, I was being selfish.

I was living my life focused on making others see only one part of me. The part I thought would make them happiest.

The helpful, positive and encouraging part.

I missed out on making authentic relationships based on sharing myself with others.

The real me. Not a “perfect” vision of what I thought others needed to see in order for me to make them happy.

I had to realize that happiness is a very personal thing.

It isn’t anyone else’s responsibility to make you happy.

No one else can control or realistically even influence another person’s happiness.

Happiness is deeply personal.

Any attempts at trying to making others happy will likely lead to sorrow for yourself, eventually.

Happiness really does come from within.

You get to make a choice to be happy. You don’t make that choice for anyone else but yourself.

Even trying to find the things that make you happy turns into an endless journey.

Make it your mission to be happy no matter what happens.

Pay attention to the stories about happiness that you tell yourself.

They start with, “I’ll be happy when...”

I was controlled by this one:

“I’ll be happy when I make other people happy.”

I didn’t care for things to make me happy. I relied on other people to make me happy.

I now see that my happiness is tied to my own emotions. My feelings about myself. The stories I tell myself.

That’s it. Nothing more, nothing less.

Finding those stories and connecting them to the emotions I have has led to countless discoveries about what makes me happy.