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Today I saw one of the most massive bouncers I have ever seen in my life. That guy was not born. He was constructed! I had an IV for the event but my heart was skipping beats as I approached the entrance. As I walked towards the entrance I noticed I was alone. 
I was like: "There is no way I am walking up to that guy alone to show him my IV. His magnificence is too much for me. I need to join a group to approach him. So I loitered around, looking at the sky, admiring the sun & tying my shoe lace, despite not wearing shoes with laces.
As I loitered around, two guys walked over & were approaching the entrance when they saw him. They turned back & came to stand with me. One of them was so stunned he uttered a string of profanities which I cannot repeat but translates mildly to "Gademmit! Holy cow! What the hell!
Three of us stood admiring the sun, staring at the sky and talking about nothing. We started to strategize as to how to approach the entrance because the sun was really bearing down and jollof rice may finish if we don't go in. How we wan take enter this place now?
Two more people joined our party of three and we became five. You can refer to us as the Fellowship of the Reception, thank you very much. So shall we approach in a 2-1-2 formation or in a 1-2-2 formation? Or maybe we should just pull a blitzkrieg.
Finally we decided it's best to just walk to the entrance as a group. And so with a great amount of hesitation & trepidation, we walked to the gallows. Pardon me! I mean we walked to the entrance. As we approached the entrance Oga bouncer's eyes fixed upon us.
At this point, I had half a mind to turn back and run for the gate but I felt it would be a bad idea to chicken out on my boys, so we die here! Like lily livered men. We got there and no one wanted to be the first to hand him the IV.
Oga bouncer was impatient, what with standing in the sun all day attending to approved guests and warding off gate crashers, so our collective skittishness was too much to bear. "If you don't have an IV, turn back now!" His voice boomed.
Despite having a valid IV I began to have doubts. As the other guys handed theirs, I took a good look at mine to make sure it was valid. I checked the date and the names of the couples to make sure I was at the right reception. I no wan chop beating by mistake.
As I handed him mine, I looked up at him cautiously. I got to his biceps and stopped there. I couldn't go further. This guy was heavily built! Imagine what Thanos must have looked like as a teenager. That was what this dude looked like.
As he took my IV and looked at it, I felt my heart rate rising and my chest tightening. "This must be what a stroke feels like", I thought. He stepped aside and let us all through. To say we were relieved is an understatement. We were over the moon!
As we sat down to savor our victory, I looked toward the entrance where I saw some guys without IVs pleading with the bouncer to let them through, that they were related to the groom. For where! Dude did not budge. His massive frame covered the doorway.
In my mind I was like: "Is this not madness? How do you approach a bouncer this huge without an IV? We sef wey get IV our heart dey cut as we waka enter. Haq haq haq, you don't know what is going on."
