1/ Welcome to Tuesday in the independent republic of Brexitlandia or as some now call it GROUNDHOGDAY 😱😱😱
2/ @MichelBarnier was in London yesterday making full use of his FOM rights to explain in English that as the UK is leaving it cannot have the same deal as a member of the EU & needs to make some choices 🤔
3/ With a level of clarity that escapes the Maybot and Cretinus Maximus @DavidDavisMP he explained how leaving the SM and CU will create friction
4/ Cretinus Maximus @DavidDavisMP immediately hit back that the UK wants a bespoke deal with frictionless trade 🙄
5/ Because @MichelBarnier is a much cooler cucumber than me he resisted the urge to scream "WELL FUCKING STAY IN THE SM AND CU THEN" 😬
6/ Some in the cabinet think reality will force the UK into a customs union amp.ft.com/content/aaeb18…
7/ That is because the UK has done no customs preparatory work and hired precisely zero extra customs staff to deal with the increase in trading friction 😳amp.ft.com/content/aaeb18…
8/ In addition para 49 of the phase 1 deal (aka the Great Capitulatory Fudge) requires the UK to align with the rules of the SM and CU as a fallback to prevent a hard border amp.ft.com/content/ee480e…
9/ Because 18 months on the Government still does not know what it wants that fallback option is the most likely outcome unless they can agree a deal & arrange bespoke customs infrastructure to be in place by March 2019 which they can only do once the deal is actually approved 🤥
10/ And if the UK has to follow those rules it will naturally require an obligation on the EU to treat the UK as if it were part of the SM & CU. 👏👏
11/ After all only a cretin would accept an obligation to align with those rules without requiring the EU to treat the UK in a non-discriminatory way when applying those rules 🤤🤤🤤
12/ which leads on to the conclusion we may as well stay in the SM and CU. It protects the GFA, guarantees frictionless trade and puts @LiamFox out of a job. You see it is possible to have your cherry cake and eat it 🎂
13/ But there are those who do not want to be in a customs union. People like @DanielJHannan. He says there is no serious argument for that 
14/ @DanielJHannan thinks protecting the GFA and ensuring frictionlesss trade are not serious arguments. @DanielJHannan does not do facts or reality. I am surprised @DExEUgov has not recruited him already
15/ Apparently the GOV has a secret database where they track all the projects to do with Brexit, like the status of impact assessments, all the work at Dover, all the new regulatory bodies the U.K. now needs, all the specific border control changes it intends to bring forward
16/ But it is so secret it only exists in Cretinus Maximus @DavidDavisMP head because that way it cannot be hacked thetimes.co.uk/article/secret…?amp=1
17/ One of the secret projects is how to deal with the reduced international standing of the UK given it wants to get rid of the charter of fundamental rights gu.com/p/832g5/stw?amp=1
18/ It is remarkable that another country does not want extradite an alleged fraudster to a country run by fraudsters. Apparently the @DExEUgov work around is to shout GLOBAL BRITAIN while standing on the currently invisible Irish border 🗣
19/ Still the GOV do not seem to get what impact they are having. For example, EU student numbers are down since the referendum
20/ And here is the latest update on EU27 citizens' status in the U.K.:
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22/ And here is the latest on the status of U.K. citizens in the EU27:
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24/ And given the important contribution of EU27 citizens to our economy and public services, naturally the Government has delayed its paper on immigration til the Autumn amp.ft.com/content/c92d34…
25/ Presumably because the paper will be an impact assessment that concludes EU27 citizens are net contributors to the economy and it is a myth that students overstay their "welcome".
26/ Undermining the Maybot's redlines that are based on her own hatred of foreigners rather than evidence would be most unpatriotic 🇬🇧
27/ Which explains why junior brownnoser @jamesosh makes clear it is ONLY BRITISH TAXPAYERS THAT FUND THE NHS. Those pesky EU27 types that pay their taxes in the U.K. they contribute nothing. Especially the ones that work in the NHS and pay tax. amp.theguardian.com/society/2018/f…
28/ And that exceptionalism is why only a British Government could have a referendum with no plan, trigger a 2 year clock with no plan & still have no plan 18 months after the vote 🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧
29/ And that exceptionalism is why the will of the people means that only a small group, the Cabinet, get to decide what Brexit actually means even though each cabinet member is so exceptional they each have to make an exception for one another #takebackcontrol
