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I've never understood this license plate brag, it's like the Moon taking credit for Neil Armstrong
Iowans know to stay in their lane 
Me, stirring up shit between Ohio and North Carolina
I mean NC has many things they can brag about, like Tobacco Road college hoops or all those famous moonshine runner stock car racers. Their license plates should read "Birthplace of Drunk Smoking Nascartball"
Ohio should have "Rust In Peace"
When historians finally sort out the Great North Carolina-Ohio War of 2019, I I will be famous as its Gavrilo Princip
What other random states should I stir up anger between, and over what? Obviously Maine and Idaho need have a donnybrook over the Potato King title
New York and Illinois should battle it out over who deserves the "We Need More U-Hauls" slogan
North Dakota's "Birthplace of Pasta" vs California's "Gluten Free Or Die" should be good for some fireworks
Nevada and New Jersey are the 1-2 seeds for the "Shallow Grave State" title
Oregon vs Vermont for "Unvaccinated Kids": it is ON
In the great 50-state barroom brawl, Florida is that wild-eyed drifter on the last stool talking to invisible voices that nobody is gonna mess with
On the midget wrestling undercard, it's Rhode Island vs Delaware for the "I Can't Believe It's an Actual State" world title belt
Iowa vs Utah for "Land of 10,000 Jellos"
