— Jumbo high-definition television screens will be
— A Virtual Reality Outrage Booster tent will allow
— The Indoor Skydiving Trump Donation Experience uses a giant wind
There will be, as the president promised, “the brand-new Sherman tanks
There will be powerful military jets
And of course, the highlight of the night will be a speech by our great leader, the best president in the 1,000-year history of America.
In keeping with our all-American ethics,
So welcome to President Donald J. Trump’s glorious Salute to America. Enjoy your day, donate money until you feel American glory coursing through your veins and give a full-throated cheer to CELEBRATE ALL AMERICANS, except for: