When a woman speaks up it’s an act of bravery. Whether she speaks up after a day, a decade or 19 years, is immaterial.
thequint.com/voices/opinion…
thequint.com/voices/opinion…
I see a lot folks, men & women, counter those #MeToo victims who are outing their tormentors after an ‘extended’ period saying that there was always a choice to walk away, that strong women give it back , why speak up now, when they were ‘complicit’ & ‘agreed’ to be exploited ...
I'm ashamed to admit that I used to share such sentiments when the #Weinstein stories first began coming out. ( Yes it’s been a while, and that’s how long it’s taken, to now , finally become a talking point here). As I spoke to other women, I realised not everyone is 'strong' .
Not every one is capable of taking a stand. Women are ashamed, the deeply patriarchal upbringing and environment, makes them believe that somehow it’s their fault. That everything is their fault. From a bad marriage, to not producing male offspring...
The onus of all that’s wrong is placed on a woman. In this context- is it really possible to speak up? It’s easy to pontificate from a position of empowerment - believing that you’re a *strong woman* and that you can 'give it back ', walk way.
You’re a strong woman largely because of your circumstances- support systems, upbringing, and yes in some measure your innate strength. It is a privilege in our society to be empowered and be ‘strong’. It’s certainly NOT the norm.
What is empowerment? - it’s the power our support system ie family, friends, environment, gives you to make the choices . What to study, where to study, what career to chose, when to marry, who to marry, when to have children etc etc.
Even in our liberal forward thinking circles, women don’t have these choices.
Women are forced to stay in bad marriages, for example, because they aren’t financially empowered. Probably why people stick around in bad work situations, because very often they have no where to go.
Women are forced to stay in bad marriages, for example, because they aren’t financially empowered. Probably why people stick around in bad work situations, because very often they have no where to go.
For those who are shocked by their friends being outed - "Also, it is entirely possible that a man could be ‘honourable’ in his conduct with one woman (some women), while being downright offensive with others. Which is why one can’t issue character certificates. "
"Because no one ever truly really knows another person; not their deepest and darkest bits. I have, in the past, worked with some men who today stand accused of misdemeanors. I didn’t witness that side to them. Does that mean we should disbelieve the women coming forward? "
