, 14 tweets, 4 min read Read on Twitter
Hey Bill Barr, the 80s called. They want their strategic deception clown act back.

Look, I'm not sure what you've spent your post-GHWB years doing (other than working for firms that rep the Russian mob), but 30 years after your first fake "principal conclusions" summary, things around here have changed a bit.
When you pulled that "principle conclusions" magic hat act back in 1989, Americans primarily relied on what the 6:00 news told them. Anyone who wanted to dig deeper would have to go to a big library and hope for up-to-date periodicals and newspapers. It would take FOREVER.
Now we have this new amazing thing. It's called THE INTERNET. It's fantastic. See, I do a search for "Bill Barr" … and I get all THIS CRAZY STUFF about how conflicted you are!
Another new fandangly thing we acquired since your last coverup was … CABLE NEWS! Holy smokes, did you see this FORTY MINUTE @Maddow segment from last night????

Back in 1989, all we had is Brokaw reading a press release.

Oh, and … TWITTER! I noticed you don't have an account so maybe you don't know about this tool. Sure yeah, it's got its problems, but those birds travel faster than you can imagine.
So, for example, some Emotional Intelligence expert in Nevada does a read on your non-verbals and voila! Thousands of people can read about it within seconds.

(By the way, apparently you've got some ego problems you might want to address).


We don't have to wait for the 6pm tomorrow. No, the moment the Mueller Report is released, MILLIONS of us will get an instant notification. We will drop everything and do a hunt for Easter eggs in that report ALL WEEKEND.
You will literally have people like me filling in the blanks within hours, minutes even.

The Information Age. See? It's a thing of beauty.
We get that there may be classified information that the public shouldn't see. Sources, methods, ongoing investigation stuff. We're okay with that.

Doesn't mean Congress shouldn't get an unredacted copy. And they will.

But if someone at Mueller's office realizes you're hiding non-classified things for purely political ends, we'll hear about it.

We're not all exactly sure WHO nudged you to crawl out of old man's semi-retirement cave so you could run the old "principle conclusions" magic hat gambit again, but this is not your parents' electorate anymore, buddy.
We're smart. We're resourceful. We're connected. We're hungry. We're pissed.

And we're watching.

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