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Keira Churchill #EyesOnIdlib
@keira_churchill
, 3 tweets, 1 min read Read on Twitter
BUSINESS NEGOTIATIONS THE NORMAL WAY

“If I don't get what I want then I'll return to my HQ and carry on as usual.”

BUSINESS NEGOTIATIONS THE BREXIT WAY

“I've wired up my HQ with TNT. If I don't get what I want then I'll demolish my office building and start over with nothing.”
BUYING A CAR THE NORMAL WAY

If I don't like the deal on offer then I'll walk out of your dealership and drive home in the car I already own.

BUYING A CAR THE BREXIT WAY

If I don't like the deal on offer then I'll set fire to my existing car and walk home with nothing.
BUYING A HOUSE THE NORMAL WAY

“If you don't accept my offer then I'll stay where I am.”

BUYING A HOUSE THE BREXIT WAY

“If you don't accept my offer then I'll smash up my place with a wrecking ball, withdraw my life savings from the bank, put the cash in a skip & set it ablaze”
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More from @keira_churchill see all

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Keira Churchill #NHSLove
@keira_churchill
Leave: Let's go skydiving.
Remain: Without a parachute?
Leave: Of course there'll be parachutes.

...Later...

UK: Hold on. Where are the parachutes?

Leave: We voted to leave the plane. Nobody cares about you parachute moaners.

UK: We care.

Leave: We already voted. Get out!
UK: You assured us there would be parachutes.

Leave: You told voters there'd be no parachutes.

UK: You said the lack of parachutes was just “project fear”.

Leave: You're afraid, right?

UK: Of course. We don't want to die.

Leave: Nobody can see the future. Just jump already.
Pilot: The plane will run out of fuel soon.

UK: We want the opportunity to vote to land.

Pilot: I agree.

Leave: Experts shmexperts. The choices are to jump or die in a plane crash.

Corbyn: Look at this lovely turnip.

Pilot: Brace! We're going to crash!

Leave: Project fear!
Read 4 tweets
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Keira Churchill
@keira_churchill
1️⃣ Imagine a law that allows a government to "make any provision that could be made by an Act of Parliament (including modifying this Act)"
2️⃣ I'm not sure if people realise just how dangerous that power is. They can do literally anything with it. It needs to be voted down.
3️⃣ There's a good reason why this is referred to as Henry VIII power.
Read 8 tweets

Related threads

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Alec Muffett
@AlecMuffett
#Brexit in a nutshell: theguardian.com/politics/2019/…
I'm confident that the reason we're in this mess is that the men involved in #Brexit are those who grew up on a diet of "Battle", "Warlord" & "Commando" comics, which is how we got our mindless xenophobia:
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_Pi…
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Warlord_(…
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Commando_…
Nowadays it would all be #CallOfDuty and so forth, but we'd be playing on servers with PEOPLE WHO ARE IN THE OTHER COUNTRIES AND COULD LOOK PAST THE STORYLINE
Read 5 tweets
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katya adler
@BBCkatyaadler
No10 says EU must decide if it will release a letter of assurances before the vote on Tuesday but EU sources tell me they are waiting for the go-ahead advice from Downing Street 1
The letter could have been released Saturday night ahead of No10 Sunday media blitz but wasn’t .. It could be released tonight or tomorrow ahead of vote .. OR EU/No10 may decide better not since 2
The EU letter will I’m told contain assurances/explanations of current deal and nothing new. The letter would come from Juncker/Tusk in Brussels and they can’t change the #Brexit deal without negotiation with and go ahead from 27 EU leaders 3
Read 20 tweets
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tony nog #FBPE
@tony_nog
1) 6 pointless, time wasting exercises the Tory & Labour parties want to put the country through before we can start work on #Brexit

There are only 2 options left, May’s deal or Remain. There’s no majority for no deal and no time or appetite for a new negotiation
#PeoplesVote
2) There is only 3 months left and the country is in a state of worry. Despite this, and despite the ticking clock the 2 major parties are insisting on self indulgent frippery and posturing before we can get to the real business of fixing #Brexit
3) Lets take the Tory party. Firstly, they’re about to engage in another Leadership contest. May will probably win this but even if she doesn’t it will consume weeks of time for no purpose because it won’t itself change anything in Brexit. The same issues will exist afterwards
Read 14 tweets
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Nick🇬🇧🇪🇺
@nicktolhurst
1/ A small thread on why BOTH many Remainers & Leavers still havent "got" that #Brexit has already failed...
....even if it goes ahead.
& why its often "media noise" rather than "actual lies" is obscuring this & the fact that Brexit wont happen as we thought it would 2 years ago.
2/ Basic Leave idea pre #Brexit vote was that a prosperous UK with large trade deficit eager to retain many European standards wld not really offer a threat to EU was not completely implausible as many remainers assumed.
But it depended on....
3/ Basic #Brexit idea was to convince EU that with a bit of compromise & British payments UK cld leave single mkt but retain full access to it while it worked out its future. Indeed many sensible Leavers didnt want radical change overnight..however there was one small problem....
Read 16 tweets
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Steve Parks
@steveparks
Once again the @frontlineclub is packed with journalists, @Byline_Media folk, and TV cameras for the latest revelations in the Cambridge Analytica / Trump / Brexit saga from two whistleblowers.

Follow this thread for live-tweeting coverage, and forgive my typos...
... first thing to note is that security has been increased a level or two since last week’s gathering. Two checkpoints against the guest list, and a minder scanning the room.

We’re about to kick off...
... the focus of attention tonight is Shahmir Sanni, joined again by @chrisinsilico who was the focus last week. @carolecadwalla will be joining later when she’s filed at the @guardian
Chris is carrying a large ring binder of documents...
Read 49 tweets
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Nick🇬🇧🇪🇺
@nicktolhurst
1/ Very small thread on why many people (including me) have been getting #Brexit wrong. We've been blinded by the theatre & complex issues of the "EU negotiations" - but in fact its much simpler than that....indeed.....
2/ #Brexit "EU negotiations" are not in any significant way actually taking place, & to the extent that that they are at a minor level even these are largely irrelevant. Once I grasped this everything else of the last 12 months made sense.....
3/ The political establishment whether Corbyn's Labour or May's Conservatives (& indeed much of the political media) are, contrary to the breathless reporting of BBC etc, largely unconcerned with the concrete nature of the EU process (not negotiations) of #Brexit. For 2 reasons..
Read 12 tweets

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