Thread by @amasonic

This thing some feminists do where they call women who don't hold the same progressive views on gender relations 'pick-me' is quite short-sighted & erroneously assumes that these women hold these views solely for the approval of men.

On the contrary, it is mostly because this is all they have known & have likely seen around them. Ppl don't let go of ideas & beliefs that have been passed down millennia in an instant.

So yes, you have unlearned your own patriarchal beliefs & you are now fighting for women's/gender equality - but not every woman has done same. It is not by arrogantly calling such women 'pick-mes' that their own views will evolve to be like yours.

If anything, the best such name-calling will achieve is to stop these women from expressing their views on such platforms but holding on to them dearly & practicing them too.

Why not engage them instead? Point out the flawed logic in their positions? Make them see from a different perspective?
Aren't these things possible?

I know how many women I meet almost daily who hold patriarchal views on so many issues. They aren't trying to get picked. It is what they have known all their lives. In many cases, one conversation was all it took to give them a fresh perspective.

Then there is also the great irony that many of the feminists calling others 'pick-me' themselves still hold & express patriarchal views on many issues. You still see such tweets now and then.

In the end, we all are patriarchal, even if it's just 1% of our views. It just so happens that some are more patriarchal than others.