Thread by @arbedout

It's days like this I wonder - is it time for the ground up beetles, or the wheat poultices?

(Thread on how George Washington died. Mostly.)

On the evening of Dec 12, 1799, Washington came down with a nasty cough. It progressively worsened over the next 36 hours, until he woke up in the middle of the night on the 14th in severe respiratory distress.

The laypeople around him - the estate overseer and his personal secretary - first made him an elixir of molasses, vinegar and butter to treat his sore, swollen throat.

He damn near choked him death on it.

pbs.org/newshour/healt…

They sent for a doctor, and in the meantime began a course of venesection - literally, bloodletting (though Mrs. Washington begged against it, Washington himself urged them on).

The bloodletting didn't change anything, and two more doctors were called; meanwhile, the first had arrived, and, alarmed by Washington's appearance, placed a "blister of anthracite" - a powder of ground beetles - around his throat.

Then he drained another 40 ounces of blood.

This pattern repeats over and over- a doctor shows up at Washington's bedside, blanches at his appearance, tries some bizarre treatment - vinegar gargle? calomel and tarter enema? More ground up beetles? - interspersed with yet more bloodletting.

Finally around 8:00 PM, the doctors apply wheat poultices to Washington's throat, and confer among themselves. The patient seems to be near death; one doctor proposes a radical new procedure as a last resort - a tracheotomy, to allow Washington to breath without obstruction.

The other doctors overruled him. Shoving tartar emetic up Washington's arse inducing violent diarrhea? Draining nearly 4 liters of blood from an ill 69 year old? These were tried and true treatments, known and trusted by these men.

But a tracheotomy? Out of the question.

This is how the most qualified professionals, using the best methods known to them, tortured Washington to death. Their preferred treatment (bloodletting) almost certainly killed him. The rejected alternative was, in retrospect, the only thing that might have saved him.

And all the steps taken in between - the wheat poultices, the ground beetles, the vinegar gargles, all of it - was window dressing, an absurd ritual to allow these Very Serious People to delude themselves into thinking they were saving the patient while they slowly murdered him.

Anyway, the Fed's cutting rates today, is what I'm getting at.