Literally kill me now
It isn't the "electric" that has me mixing cyanide in my coffee, it's the fucking "SUV"
FORD MEETING
Head of marketing: what's our biggest brand equity asset?
Staff: well I guess Mustang, then Bronco, then F Series....
HoM: great, call the assembly line and tell 'em to glue Mustang logos on everything
Head of marketing: what's our biggest brand equity asset?
Staff: well I guess Mustang, then Bronco, then F Series....
HoM: great, call the assembly line and tell 'em to glue Mustang logos on everything
Can't wait for the new Ford GT80 
They should remake "Ford vs Ferrari," but instead of LeMans it should take place at the drop off circle at La Jolla Middle School
wait, WTAF is this
I guess incredibly dumb enough to look at the sales figures for Porsche's line of 42-cupholder, 7 foot tall, 6-door SUVs
FOCUS GROUP
"I'd like a prestigious high performance sports car"
OK
"But with room for 6"
check
"4 doors & a lift gate for groceries"
mm hmm
"make it 7 ft tall so I can see over traffic"
OK
"and super quiet inside"
sure
"with bluetooth so I can read my texts"
OK fuck this I quit
"I'd like a prestigious high performance sports car"
OK
"But with room for 6"
check
"4 doors & a lift gate for groceries"
mm hmm
"make it 7 ft tall so I can see over traffic"
OK
"and super quiet inside"
sure
"with bluetooth so I can read my texts"
OK fuck this I quit
This is pretty bad, but for a truly incomprehensible act of brand suicide watch "Bottled Up," about Dr Pepper corporate waging a legal jihad on Texas's beloved Dublin Dr Pepper. You'll never claim to be a Pepper again
To begin to fathom how idiotic Dr Pepper corporate is, they demolished their own landmark tourist attraction 1930s Streamline Deco HQ in Dallas to make way for a Kroger, and along with it, $3 gazillion in community goodwill
In conclusion, as proud owner of 7 vehicles produced by the Ford Motor Company, this will not be one of them
A good rule of thumb for marketing professionals: if your customers have tattoos of your logo, don't mess with the product
Anybody who gets an Iowahawk tattoo also gets a free follow and restraining order
In the end, I guess I don't blame Ford, or Ferarri, or Porsche for making these things. I blame a dipshit status-chasing consumer market that obviously craves a sensible minivan sheep in supercar wolves' clothing
