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Ah, I see the Dark Powers have finally pulled Trump into Ravenloft. About damn time.
I picture Trump's darkrealm Yugeoslavia appearing next to Darkon. Azalin Rex looks out the window and is like "you have got to be fucking kidding me."
Trump spends all day doddering around the darkrealm sucking at golf, CONSTANTLY shanking drives right into Azalin's tower window.
He's trapped in the darkrealm, of course, but he's the only darklord who can't seal his borders against invasion.
He's trapped in the darkrealm, of course, but he's the only darklord who can't seal his borders against invasion.
As a result, he can never manage to muster up enough intelligent undead to build a wall. The Vistani have just SWARMED into the darkrealm and taken all the jobs. There's goulash wagons on every street corner...
He lives in CONSTANT fear of a mighty paladin named Mueller the Inquisitor and his "12 Furious Acolytes" who keep undermining his schemes.
Constantly tormented by his inadequacy and unpopularity, Trump spends every night in his chambers being soothed by a magic mirror that tells him everything he wants to hear, even as the skies outside his keep are black and putrid from the burning garbage encircling his castle.
Not so. Adventurers from all across the Demiplane flock to his castle because they've heard RUMORS of what you describe, only to find all the treasure is illusory, worthless, or a cheap fake. Their entire trip is wasted.
Even the cursed items suck because the curses aren't even that interesting. Like a magic cloak that, no matter what you're wearing, just looks... tacky.
Or a magic amulet that makes you crave fish sandwiches. Not all the time. And even then, it's just, y'know, fish, I guess.
Or a magic amulet that makes you crave fish sandwiches. Not all the time. And even then, it's just, y'know, fish, I guess.
Like, the magic cloak doesn't affect your Charisma score. It's not even worth mentioning. It's just... it's not a good look. That's all you're saying.
There's also this magic ring? Called the Ring of Vague Uncertainty?
It's like, it sort of does something? Like make you end every sentence in a slightly higher tone as if you were asking a question?
It's like, it sort of does something? Like make you end every sentence in a slightly higher tone as if you were asking a question?
