Let’s be completely honest. Scott Frost can sprinkle whatever fairy dust he has, but Nebraska will never be great again until we bring back Old Herbie.
Reason why Old Herbie is 100x better, a thread...
Reason why Old Herbie is 100x better, a thread...
Old Herbie stores his money in dozens of mason jars buried throughout his property.
New Herbie has a diversified stock portfolio, bonds, low yielding mutual funds, business investments and a Roth IRA.
New Herbie has a diversified stock portfolio, bonds, low yielding mutual funds, business investments and a Roth IRA.
Old Herbie once killed a raccoon with a banana peal and a straw wrapper.
If New Herbie finds an ant in his kitchen he catches it and then drives it to a protected forest for a safe release.
If New Herbie finds an ant in his kitchen he catches it and then drives it to a protected forest for a safe release.
Old Herbie smokes a 1930 Cuban cigar on his front porch before bed every night.
New herbie vapes.
New herbie vapes.
Old Herbie has never left Lancaster County.
New Herbie posts pictures on IG of his travels with generic white people hashtags.
New Herbie posts pictures on IG of his travels with generic white people hashtags.
When ordering an appetizer old Herbie preferred an 16 oz steak and mashed potatoes.
New Herbie prefers a modest portion of shrimp tar tar.
New Herbie prefers a modest portion of shrimp tar tar.
Old Herbie has a doomsday bunker under his house loaded with dry and canned goods and ammunition.
New Herbie believes in a one world government
New Herbie believes in a one world government
Old Herbie drives a 1980 GMC Seirra because he can't justify buying a new one when, "this one runs just fine."
New Herbie drives a Prius because, "the environment."
New Herbie drives a Prius because, "the environment."
Old Herbie's wife bought fabric at the general store and sewed his overalls herself.
New Herbie has a personal shopper at Ralph Lauren.
New Herbie has a personal shopper at Ralph Lauren.
Old Herbie would shave with a fixed blade Puukko hunting knife.
New Herbie pays a stylist $40 for a conditioning treatment and blowout
New Herbie pays a stylist $40 for a conditioning treatment and blowout
Old Herbie would put Budweiser in his Corn Flakes and whiskey in is morning glass of OJ.
New Herbie had a glass or red wine with his dinner for the antioxidants.
New Herbie had a glass or red wine with his dinner for the antioxidants.
Old Herbie used to detassel corn with his own two hands.
New Herbie is more of a manager who sits on his porch sipping tea while his employees harvest the corn.
New Herbie is more of a manager who sits on his porch sipping tea while his employees harvest the corn.
Old Herbie enjoys roasting hot dogs and s’mores over an open fire.
New Herbie only eats organic vegan tofu sprouts steamed with distilled water
New Herbie only eats organic vegan tofu sprouts steamed with distilled water
Old Herbies house is a 4-bd craftsman on a 150-year old farm.
New Herbies house is a "safe space"
New Herbies house is a "safe space"
Old Herbie fought in Korea AND Nam.
New Herbie fights high blood pressure and diabetes.
New Herbie fights high blood pressure and diabetes.
Old Herbie loves to feel the prairie winds sweep through his locks.
New Herbie regularly contemplates growing a man bun.
New Herbie regularly contemplates growing a man bun.
Old Herbie takes his coffee as black as Shawn Eichorst’s soul.
New Herbie drinks a grande skinny half-Caf pumpkin latte no foam.
New Herbie drinks a grande skinny half-Caf pumpkin latte no foam.
Old Herbie carried a leather wallet with every receipt he’s ever received in his back pocket.
New Herbie has a murse
New Herbie has a murse
Old Herbie’s kids were named Dave, John, and Sue.
New Herbie’s kids are Persimmon, Lavender, and Stone
New Herbie’s kids are Persimmon, Lavender, and Stone
Old herbie could parallel park a horse carriage
New Herbie has to use his back up camera to reverse out of the wholes food parking lot
New Herbie has to use his back up camera to reverse out of the wholes food parking lot
Old Herbie grinds his calluses down using a belt sander.
New Herbie prevents calluses with a nightly 6-phase moisturizing regime as well as avoiding manual labor.
New Herbie prevents calluses with a nightly 6-phase moisturizing regime as well as avoiding manual labor.
Old Herbie once pierced his pinky toe with a nail in a roofing accident.
New Herbie once pierced his nose, naval and ears in a "I got drunk and made a bad decision" accident.
New Herbie once pierced his nose, naval and ears in a "I got drunk and made a bad decision" accident.
Old Herbie bottled his feelings up and didn’t tell anyone
New Herbie has an emotional support dog
New Herbie has an emotional support dog
Old Herbie liked Lynard Skynard and AC/DC.
New Herbie likes a few bands, "but you've probably never heard of them."
New Herbie likes a few bands, "but you've probably never heard of them."
Old Herbie didn’t bother bringing the Missouri-Nebraska Bell out of storage because he knew they weren’t going to lose it anyways.
New Herbie pretends the Broken Chair doesn’t exist because you can’t lose a trophy that doesn’t exist.
New Herbie pretends the Broken Chair doesn’t exist because you can’t lose a trophy that doesn’t exist.
