Thread by @HaggardHawks

The expression “GOOD DAY, FELLOW!”–“AXE HANDLE!” can be used to call attention to an apparently random or puzzling contribution to a conversation. Adopted from Scandinavia, its roots lie in an 18th century Norwegian comic folktale.

Which goes like this... THREAD! 1/10

The story concerns a hard-of-hearing old ferryman, who has borrowed so much money from friends that he and his poor family have ended up in trouble with the local bailiff. And sure enough, one morning the ferryman sees the bailiff walking down the long road to his home. 2/10

Unsure what the bailiff might want to know, the ferryman decides to prepare for their conversation in advance. So he takes a seat on his porch, and begins to whittle some wood while he thinks. 3/10

“First he’ll ask me what I’m working on here,” the ferryman reasons, “so I’ll tell him that it’s an axe handle. Then he’ll ask me how long it’ll be when it is finished. Then he’ll want to know where my ferry is, where my horse is, and finally where my cattle pasture is.” 4/10

Happy that he has apparently prepared his answers to all the bailiff’s questions, the old ferryman sits and waits for him to arrive.
“Good day, fellow!” the bailiff says cheerily, as he reaches the ferryman’s gate.
“Axe handle!” he replies. 5/10

With a puzzled look on his face, the bailiff continues. “Can you tell me how far it is to the nearest inn? My associate will be waiting for me there.”
“Just up to this knot!” the ferryman replies, pointing to the piece of wood that he’s currently whittling. 6/10

Even more confused than before, the bailiff goes on. “Tell me,” he asks, “is your wife at home?”
“Oh, she’s lying out on the beach,” the ferryman replies. “She’s cracked at both ends, I’m going to have to tar her!” 7/10

Now utterly bamboozled, the bailiff finally asks if he can speak to the ferryman’s daughter instead. “She’s out in the stable,” the ferryman replies, “heavily pregnant with a foal.” 8/10

Confused and now fiercely angry, the bailiff eventually gives up and walks away. “Oh, you old fool!” he shouts back. “To the devil with you!”
“Oh, that’s not that far at all,” the ferryman replies. “Just over the hill and you’re there!” 9/10

Ultimately, it was the bailiff and the ferryman’s initial mismatched exchange of “Good day, fellow!”–“Axe handle!” (or “God dag, mann!”–“Økseskaft!” in its original Norwegian) that established this odd phrase as a means of pointing out an utterly confusing non sequitur.

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