Thread by @IanDunt

People who said a second referendum would damage public trust in politics are now signing up to something they think will turn the UK into a slave state because it might get rid of a political rival.

"I declare the voting period open and I suspend the House accordingly for that period."

Ah, no. I'm told they'll actually be counted earlier. But then they debate and vote on the statutory instrument delaying Brexit day until 9pm. And then they announce.

Fucking hell it's like some kind of sadism. Will we ever be allowed to stop working.

So the voting system is very simple. MPs put yes or no next to each amendment. There';s no transferable vote or anything like that.

The purpose is not to find a winner, so do not expect to get one. It is a bit about finding losers: propositions with such little support they fall off the radar.

The intention is then to perhaps apply some other voting system - probably Alternative Vote or Single Transferable Vote - to the surviving propositions on Monday.

Sorry, I overstated that - I'm tired. It's not the intention, not yet. But it's the expectation.

Those systems are much better at weeding out people's sub-optimal outcomes, because they ask people to list their preferences. So they give a better indication of the kind of options people can live with, rather than the things they passionately want to happen.

So for instance if I was voting for Marvel films I'd put Ragnorok, Guardians 2, Infinity War in my top three and Thor 2 could get right the fuck down the back there.

Fuck Thor 2 was shit.

Anyway - that's all we'll get tonight, a sense of what the potentially viable propositions are. My suspicion is that they will be People's Vote, Boles amendment on Norway Plus, and the Clarke amendment on a customs union.

Think the standard Norway Model under Eustice will struggle, as will no-deal, revocation motion and Fysh nonsense.

Am I missing one? Probably. I am going to have another coffee and inject some Juul pod liquid directly into my bloodstream

Guys don't give me shit about he Marvel list, I was just doing top of mind. Coming up with a proper list of that shit would take genuine intellectual and emotional commitment which I do not have to offer.

Thor 2 was shit tho.

Suspension ends. MPs are now debating the statutory instrument on extending Article 50.

Crazed intervention by Brexit headbangers throughout the debate, like human cobwebs, somehow brought to life, given a trace element of cognitive ability, and handed partial control of the country.

Steve Brine , who resigned on Monday, intervenes.

"The bottom line is we are extending A50 by this SI tonight to avoid a damaging no deal exit that my constituents in Winchester do not want to see and that this House has expressly said on several occasions now - and I predict again this evening - it does not want to see."

Bernard Jenkin is not sounding very pro-dealy in the Commons right now.

Fucking hell he's mad.

"This House of Commons is left with questionable democratic legitimacy"

He literally just said that.

Kirsty Blackman, SNP: "When people voted in the June 2016 referendum, not one person mentioned the 29th of March 2019 as exit day. For anyone to say that this is the settled will of the British people is absolutely wrong."

She is sane. And therefore stands out in this debate like a tiger strolling down the banks of the Thames.

Division btw. MPs now voting on the statutory instrument. It'll pass.

Right lads way too much anti Guardians 2 commentary out there. It is structurally perfect: Every character arc, every plotline, every scene, all drive the central thesis of the film. Also it is a great story. And it is hilarious.

Complete commitment to character. Focusing on Groot in that first scene isn't just funny and lovely. It shows the values of the story.

Also and most importantly: That Mary Poppins gag is one of my favourite things in the world.

"Is she cool?"

"Hell yeah she's cool."

Anyway here's my prolonged scream of despair about the grotesque circus around Theresa May's resignation statement politics.co.uk/blogs/2019/03/…

No analysis here really. No explanation of anything. Just outrage.

They are an absolute shower of bastards.

Statutory instrument passes by 441 to 105

With a couple days to go, Britain finally shifts Brexit date in domestic law.

Bercow says staff tried to get results of indicative votes done by time of this division, but haven't managed it. So he's suspending House until they're ready.

We're never going home. No-one is ever going home.

All I know is that I have spent the week looking forward to pizza and a trip to the cinema with the missus tomorrow. I don't care what happens, I am fucking doing it.

Theresa May can announce the heat death of the universe and I am still going out with the missus to get pizza and watch a movie.

(Movie is Us, obviously)

And next week is Shazaam. Apparently DC have made a film which doesn't suck. You see. Nothing is impossible. Brexit can be stopped.

Bell is ringing. In this weird world of newfangled parliamentary shenanigans, I think that means MPs are being told to come back to the Chamber for the results.

Ok here we go.

Baron motion B: Ayes 160 Noes 400

Boles D Ayes 188 -Noes 283

Eustice Ayes 65 Noes 377

Clarke 264 noes 272

Labour plan: Ayes 237 noes 307

Cherry 184 - NO 293

Beckett ayes 268 Noes 295

Holy shit guys that's the second referendum, it almost got a majority

Fysh - Ayes 239 Noes 422

Will summarise in a bit, Letwin up now. Says he predicted nothing would get a majority

Says the plan is now for the House to consider again on Monday. Chuntering of "ridiculous", but of course that was always the plan.

They are going to try hard to demolish this process now, especially given how close the second referendum came.

Brexit secretary gets up. "Demonstrates there are no easy options here, so simple way forward."

He's doing his best - which is, admittedly, not very good - to turn this into an argument for backing May's deal.

I can tell that I am going to spend a lot of time over the next 24 hours saying 'none of them were expected to get a majority'.

Boles' Norway Plus proposal had a rougher time than expected. People's Vote had a better time than expected. The rest of the results were largely as expected.

Soubry doing great work. This is a two-stage process. Compares May deal vote with the customs union and People's Vote result.

The intention was not to find a winner today. It was to find contenders.

Bercow confirms this. There was a business of the House motion today, which the Commons passed, and that set aside Monday for the second stage.

The response from MPs on Tory benches is mock outrage. And a lot of it is fear, from seeing how close the second referendum result was. It's all slipping away from them.

Again, with feeling: There was never going to be a majority tonight. No-one expected one. politics.co.uk/blogs/2019/03/…

Bercow now having to patiently explain to Tory MPs that the House has already voted to hold another debate on Monday on this.

Angela Eagle: The customs union motion fell by 8. The People's Vote motion by 27. May's deal fell by 230 the first time and 149 the second.

Therefore a bit odd for the Brexit secretary to rule out the first two and say there'd be another meaningful vote on the govt deal.

Hoey now demanding another vote tomorrow on whether they want to debate this again Monday. The House voted to hold the debate on Monday literally a few hours ago.

House is now adjourning. I am writing up a quick report on what happened today. With you in 30 mins or so.

Indicative votes: A People's Vote just became much more likely politics.co.uk/blogs/2019/03/…

Full report on today's events: Very bad night for hardline Brexiters, bad night for soft Brexiters, good night for customs union and second referendum.

That's me. I'm going home. Enough of this dreadfulness for one day.