Thread by @louisa_schuess

Waiting for lunch hour cause I'm hungry as hell. But while waiting, let me tell you a story about a conversation I had with Mr M last week on Wednesday during lunch.

Thread

I had just gotten by the office premises after having lunch. We were waiting for the office to be opened and so I sat next to Mr M (was hoping to be told stories).

While waiting, he asked me a question
"Kodi Esther, kwanu anakukonza?"

For 3 minutes straight, I looked at this man wondering what the actual hell he was talking about. So Mr M asked again,
"Ndati, anakukonzani kwanu"

I told him I had no clue what he was on about. SO he went on to explain,

"Mukutanthauza kuti agogo ako anangololela kuti uyambe ntchito osakukonza? Olo mphini imodzi sanakutemele?"

I said "No" and man looked at me like I had just said the earth was flat

He went on to ask,
"Ukutanthauza kuti ukamabwera kuntchito kuno, umasamba madzi a waterboard basi?"

Me: "Pali madzi enanso oti ndizisamba?"
Now even I was shocked

Mr M says, "Ukapanda kusamba madzi ena ukuona ngati udzalemela bwa"

So I'm like, "Pali waterboard yina yoti madzi ake amalemeletsa"

To which he said, "muziyenda yenda, agogo ako anakulakwira, amayenekera akukhonze. Iwe umaona ngati anthu pa company pano akapasidwa ndalama chimakhala chilicha"

I was shocked again, "Anthu amalandila ndalama zina kuposa salary yawo"

Mr M "Eya"

He goes "Ndisakunamize, anthu pa company pano ananzikonza moti bwana akalowa ndikumayang'ana anthu amangoona mikango, afisi, njobvu ndizina zotelo. Akangoona choncho, mutu wake umabalalika, ndalama amangomwaza"

Me:

He continues and says "Bvuto la m'badwa wapano ndioti mumaona ngati kulemela ndikophweka. Umafunika kuzikonza munthu kuti zikuthekele."

So I asked "Inuyo moti munazikonza mulipa"

He goes "Ukatoyesa"

And then he goes "Tandigayile 500 yokhatu ndigule chinagwa"

In a slow tone I said "Inu ozikonza mukandipemphe ine osamba madzi a waterboard ine, kapempheni okozedwa anzanu"

What I found the most shocking was that Mr M ndinkulu wa mpingo ya CCAP and mans was proudly promoting using black magic.

Anyway, have a beautiful lunch. Men, remember to talk about your problems, the suicide rates are scary. Wouldn't want to lose you.

Stay blessed honies