Thread by @usnehal

Those of us who affirmed our own agency and power by learning from and with our moms. My mom’s stories are her own but she and I together have unpacked many cultural myths to learn better self compassion, willingness to identify racism, less perfectionism.
💪🏽💪🏻💪🏿 @DrvanTilburg

https://twitter.com/drvantilburg/status/1259571331852632066

This is a type of trauma many WOC/POC experience. My mom’s hair is extremely thick, textured. I recall her being very fixated on making sure her own hair & our hair was always incredibly neat.

More recently I’ve come to understand this matches an experience of having black hair.

https://twitter.com/natsfordocs/status/1345864945355800576

The so-called “model minority “is taught to align with white culture, to suppress oneself in order to layer under & serve white supremacy.

I have worked to remove internalized racism, colorism, self hate & learned from #blackexcellence on:

chalkbeat.org/2020/1/16/2112…

It means giving up certain rewards & incentives that I might otherwise access if I were to serve this purpose for the system

Rewards if I validate white supremacy while offering optics of #diversity

No
I will not be complicit
I refuse to be this

npr.org/sections/codes…

What I don’t give up is myself

#ethics not “optics”
#integrity not “prestige”

In #Urdu this is called “#khudi”

“You don’t have to make your nest on the dome of Queen’s palace,  Oh Eagle,  you are royal, choose to reside on the peaks of mountains.”

theachiever2011.wordpress.com/2011/02/16/mot…

Not exactly this since: (am paying an ungodly amount of money for ?unnecessary)

midcareer degree at an elite institution

but do so as an investment to set myself free & be an #Entrepreneur #womaninbusiness - to not be muzzled

@timnitGebru @techreview

technologyreview.com/2020/12/04/101…

What too many physicians misunderstand is that the U.S., a capitalist society, only runs businesses.

Healthcare in the U.S. is an industry, not a “profession”

As long as I am employed by somebody else I must deliver on the incentives that THEY decide

anchor.fm/the-state-of-h…

So what is the opportunity in a capitalist society to have “khudi” and integrity?

Set myself free from having a boss

Generate new value that is so “shiny” that others want a piece of it

do well by doing good

#socialenterprise

why I just submitted to:
pkgcenter.mit.edu/programs/ideas/

There is an extremely high rate of failure in #entrepreneurship, something as high as 90%

So am trying to set myself up for success in a space where the overwhelming odds are I will fail

#WomeninBusiness #womenentrepreneurs #womeninleadership

investopedia.com/articles/perso…

However when I look at women like @ayshakhoury @DrOmolara @timnitGebru @oni_blackstock @uche_blackstock and so many others, if, as a WOC, especially if black, in the U.S. one begins to see & own one’s own value, be #authentic, and #ethics (not optics), will fail within systems.

https://twitter.com/ayshakhoury/status/1356613921147260929

Many #womeninleadership struggle with this paradigm shared here by @DrvanTilburg

If I am a good boss to others, like I strive to be, will fail to deliver to my own boss or board or whomever creates incentives - I will fail

Those “below” will “pull me down” is mindset of many

https://twitter.com/DrvanTilburg/status/1344361486127390721

Do #womeninleadership actually make settings more equitable for early career #womeninSTEM?

Equity-minded & ethical women fail, in fact. I see exactly why this @nature article was published & do not agree with retraction

Men have the resources to mentor

linkedin.com/posts/usnehal_…

I did not know existence of the #glasscliff until after I was already flying off of it - unintentionally pushed off/pulled down by the people “below” assuming I had power & resources

My servant leader mindset: not focused on first securing my own self

hbr.org/2011/01/how-wo…

In fact, when a woman/WOC attains title or optics of power (only optics as is always conditional thus not actual power), while also often paid less, what she does earn is resentment.

Having #ethics means saying things hard to hear which causes blowback:

finance.yahoo.com/news/why-we-di…

What #womeninleadership conferences don’t tell you:

yes, women less willing to sacrifice #ethics for status

=unspoken selection process/gatekeeping of which women are in leadership vs not
(ethical um.. “flexibility”)

I have yet to be shown a solution

cnn.com/2013/05/15/bus…

I am increasingly outspoken about failure of white feminism

or oft quoted @BreneBrown

following her 🌈🦋🦄 ❤️ivory tower advice, if my goal is to measurable change in outcomes for black mothers & babies in #NYC

will send me flying off the glass cliff without a parachute.

https://twitter.com/usnehal/status/1318890735190609921

It is only when I started to listen to black women like @DrOmolara @mdawriter I understood what I have been experiencing in disparities work

why #authenticity or #vulnerability advice from white feminists is wrong, harmful, & even can lead to career suicide/demise so to speak

https://twitter.com/dromolara/status/1229050343478132737

I understand what it means to live under seige from living in a literal war zone - my dad’s job was in the Middle East - our seemingly idyllic safe home because scary overnight

THAT is the mindset I need to have when navigating my career & white spaces figuratively, or literally

https://twitter.com/mondairejones/status/1356468155573555200

By nature I am somebody who has optimistic, futuristic, positive, “visionary”, strategic traits

not a whole lot of paranoia
this causes me to fail to self protect

founders do best of paranoid & harness it

Well, 90% failure rate could do that 😂

inc.com/bill-green/if-…

My choice either:

1-navigate a minefield of a large company where I don’t know where the bombs are until I step on them

(except I always lapse into trust & belief in my own agency)

2-accept 90% failure rate of #Entrepreneurship as a #womanentrepreneur & be this aware of risk:

https://twitter.com/usnehal/status/1355608422671130626