Thread by @usnehal

At every critical step past the early life & career stage (then rewarded for just delivering)

when protecting loved ones from harm
or #leadership

listening to #BlackExcellence/Black women gave me the framework to understand & the tools to be effective.

time.com/5869662/black-…

“Model minorities” chase impossible standards? Then let’s try to match of achievement level set by Black women

…who accomplish so much while mislabeled, hated, un-/underpaid, killed, losing their children to violence of others’ fear/anti-Blackness

wbur.org/cognoscenti/20…

This is NOT the standard:
-keep your access/proximity to power via a politician
-stay in spotlight
-use your credentials (& frowns/soothing tone) to gaslight a nation that deaths occurring not a concern to you

known for a collection of Hermès scarves…& now >700K American deaths

https://twitter.com/cspan/status/1243305260854231040

Have left/turned down jobs to if same role

I post incessantly to reach other “WOC” offered this “choice” (to harm)

Not looking for trophy
If my own immigrant mother not among deaths people “write off”, would I have this insight & commitment?

Your “hard work” NOT enuf
exploited

https://twitter.com/usnehal/status/1316972347761590272

Our mothers, as wise & dedicated as they are, as immigrants, canNOT tell us how to navigate America. They try their best without supports to teach us what they think will make us thrive. They think perfectionism they were taught will protect. It will not. npr.org/2018/12/03/672…

The sisterhood of justice seekers in America is a place that requires INTERNAL work for us to both give & receive as “safe” to others in those healing spaces. First, lose others’ voices in your head, fake shaming standards, or #impostersyndrome.

Your #impostersyndrome is actually your awareness that if you speak & “break” some made up “rule” you will be treated like #drsusanmoore

Stop letting fear rule you

Accept reality:
That danger exists
&
is OUT of your “control”

Then navigate spaces like effective Black women do

We do NOT need to wear a horsehair shirt of shame. We CAN draw on own ethnic “pride” or strengths *while* being #antiracist & pro-justice. There *are* role models “in the old country” who empower marginalized.

BUT these women do have social status.

nytimes.com/2018/02/11/obi…

That is the accomplishment of Black women & the debt we owe & what we need to learn

that most immigrant community women do not recognize while in a Lexus or on a Peloton believing “Lean In” myth

How to be effective when you do not (& never will) “belong”

For immigrant communities to value Black courage, labor, sacrifice
-broaden standards of “merit”
-lose self hating internalized imperialism/racism
-expel voices associated with that
-lean out of “model minority”
-reject fear
-trust self>system
Rise & lift

When Asian communities (that get “left out” of “URM” category/quotas)

expand definition of “merit”
past “perfect” scores

then can get into colleges based on a whole person colleges seek

then not need to file a lawsuit to dismantle affirmative action

nbcnews.com/news/asian-ame…

My own identity (“POC” & “Asian” & “minority”) misused in ways that harms Black & URM communities

is something I cannot & will not tolerate in silence

This dismantles the work of those who allowed our parents to get visas

Lacks integrity, selfish

facingsouth.org/2017/02/how-ci…

National assault on Civil Rights & #BLM activists

Multi-pronged w/💰
Make America great again
=pre-Civil Rights
before
-most Asians immigrated
-Black folx could sit next to white

Who is face/voice of this?
Children of Asian & Middle Eastern immigrants

newsweek.com/aclu-president…

Was puzzled by bizarre tweet to professionally smear me as “same” as a first year yt male resident fired for sexual innuendo

I volunteer with refugees
AMA teaches “brand”

Who cares on tweet/follower #?
(It’s 230K btw on LinkedIn)

Ah. Middle East politics in America.

Reason I revisit: you will hear “POC” from many

You need to examine
Do NOT take at face value

Deep rooted tribal hierarchy/superiority beliefs
brought into America
now are face/voice of attack on Civil Rights

invoking “POC” appropriates work of Black women
*while* anti-#BLM?

Idea of counting # of tweets was so bizarre

until..oh!

This is a tactic that *does* work with most Asians obsessed with grades, scores, metrics

Attempting to insert/activate a self-hating voice Asians especially have

Meant to trigger this shame

frontiersin.org/articles/10.33…

This is exactly the type of bullying & shaming that drives #suicide amongst #perfectionism-oriented physicians especially those of immigrant backgrounds

If your head a cacophony of others’ critique, so beaten down, cannot hear pain of Black Americans

thecity.nyc/2021/7/29/2260…

This is why self acceptance *in* America as a “WOC”

despite the many people “screaming” at you

what Black women model for us
is the antidote/shield

(Though my own dignified immigrant mother DID teach me this)

You develop a resistance to it like this scene

And IRL #BLM

Faked messages sent directly to my phone too

Escalating attempts to shame, bully, faked “gossip”
create fear, isolation, lost trust in Muslims with whom I do activism
➡️silence

=classic tactics also used by psychologists paid to design torture & violate human rights, ethics

https://twitter.com/usnehal/status/1442821058512527361

Pattern: low integrity
💰chasing
anti-#BLM crowd believes
“prestige”/“optics”>human life

Why this matters is
1-divide & conquer is classic imperialist tactic
2-these paid “#security” consultants design #surveillance #EdTech
3-those who die are our Black &/or immigrant mothers

https://twitter.com/charleswlogan/status/1469363865830019079

I do pro bono refugee health cuz some family members have been refugees. I understand, is not “hard work” but random toss of dice

These scenes of #Afghanistan brought back family stories of Partition, Daddy’s brother killed when neighborhood bombed in an India-Pakistan war…

https://twitter.com/QasimRashid/status/1428826112428236807

My #resist: do NOT accept the “vs” to get “POC” to fight

Black success is NOT “taken from” me nor “threat”

Nor do I begrudge Indians for wars/violence that killed family members - we are all still pawns in geopolitical power games

Centering Black women NOT divisive
is justice

As long as *my* “WOC” or “Muslim” identity cynically used to harm, you definitely will hear my voice, vying for a place in the attention economy. Pakistani women are not stopped by snarks, faked tweets/messages, even bullets. Am learning from Black women how to survive & thrive.

“Family separation” or “orphaned” hits me hard

As a child got put on plane to safety while my parents stayed behind in a war zone with risk of chemical attack

With an American passport, Daddy was not a “migrant” in Middle East but as “optics matter”
his “look”:of “slave labor”

https://twitter.com/DrMelissaSimon/status/1470151794403815424

From my earliest memory I knew I was under #surveillance, warned, if I said the wrong thing, I might never see my father again

I was bottom of racial hierarchy but American passport

I was a silent child to protect my father - my voice could get him imprisoned, tortured, killed

https://twitter.com/usnehal/status/1141385602157481984

I understand my racial identity triggers disgust in some who perceive self superior - anger at a “slave race” not accepting “her place” or silenced

Parallels of Middle East & U.S.
Note: 1960s
Then loopholes

I’m an adult now
Live in the U.S. again
Civil Rights exist here

I keep returning to these issues because I am in a different race/social level in each country I have lived in.

It has been bizarre, yes, to slide up and down the racial/social hierarchy in different countries.

I got this the most in the Middle East. Less in U.S.

When I read @gradydoctor 🧵 on raising a Black son prepped to speak to police.

I realize Momma taught me how to navigate airports as a Muslim, South Asian child. As a child, my job was to manage others’ fear of me else my family, especially my father, might suffer consequences.

https://twitter.com/gradydoctor/status/1162955255581159424

There is a difference in knowing you are there temporarily (us as“expats” family in Middle East)

& will return to a place you DO have citizenship rights.
Quietly accept, comply

Vs generation upon generation of #trauma of Black Americans

Latter harder on optimism/#mentalhealth

https://twitter.com/gradydoctor/status/1463629632209625093

Everyone nurtures #mentalhealth differently

Mine is to reclaim the space where my stoic mother was falling, she had scarcity mindset on spending on her own bathroom #safety, despite gifting abundance #mindset to me.

Boy who called me “messy”? Yes, am wild, chaos & creativity

Now ending this rambling (broken in parts) 🧵
Thanks for reading if you did

🧵s help me
unpack
consider
see in a new light
generate options
create new solutions
&
are drafts for📕 am writing with a #phenomenalwoman professor at MIT on women’s voices

@threadreaderapp pls unroll