, 52 tweets, 31 min read
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w john bolton would be the perfect whistle blower cause u could be in the same ass room hearing a loud ass whistle and not even know he had a whistle in his mouth
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w i dunno. seems like the kurds are panicking. has anyone tried sending them memes of nancy clapping to remind them we have a really good plan and everything is under control?
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w if a reporter who is known to be a mouthpiece of the white house, breaks a story pf a video that makes the president look like an assassin instead of a bumbling idiot, and will inspire violence towards people speaking out against him, i might not share it. thats just me tho
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w [at a bar at 12:30 on a sat night]

her: ur fav position?

me: what? lol i just met u

her: WEAK ur a chicken shit

me: fine if ur making me pick, reverse cowgirl

her: WEAK face to face eye contact is where its at. makes it million times sexier UR LAME loser

[her 2 hours later]
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w im not drinking rum at 1030 in the morning
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w damn i know christopher columbus was a rapist and did genocide and also sex trafficked kids but he just invited me to a world series game so im thinking bout going to show people that i can be friends with people i disagree with
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w BREAKING: the FBI arrested giuliani trying to flee with a one way ticket. details unclear but agents intercepted texts saying he would use the #democraticdebate as cover so he could go into hiding and managed to pull him out of trumps ass by his legs before he was gone for good.
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w they call us the big tent party cause we got shade for everyone in it
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w i understand that ur candidate is the best candidate and is the only chance we have at beating trump but im waiting to see who madonna says shell suck my dick for if i vote for them
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w u know when ur the target of whatever trump is saying, it doesnt feel like a distraction
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w ben shapiro is somewhere freaking out frantically making phone calls and dming everyone for a description of anonymous's dick
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w mitch mcconnel, lindsey graham, and the rest of the gop view the constitution as a document that establishes racism and sexism in america. if they feel these institutions are threatened, then the rules in the constitution serve no purpose to them and they will ignore them
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w the hatch act is when the media lets u on the tv for 3 years to tell lies because ur counselor to the president and u hatch into the chief of staff
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w the thing about riding two unicycles at the same is its really hard at first but after uve done it u never forget. its kinda like riding a bike in that way.
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w sokmeone bought me a bunch of calvin klein underwear which is super nice of her but i hope she doesnt expect me to start wearing underwear all the time cause that seems super controlling
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w kinda want trump to explain how high the wall in colorado is gonna be
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w ugh so im just got a person with a ridiculous body and a pretty fsce and maybe a problem with substances but i feel like criminals should not be allowed to run criminal investigations.... werent they gonna impeach barr?

nyti.ms/2Jj4hMk
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w i understand that some of yall need to dunk on hillary, but she was right bout basically everything. so if have to dunk on her u gotta make fun of her for saying trump had good kids. its pretty much the only thing
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w walking up at XI.LXXV is distracting me from achieving normal life
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w everyones all omg "barr is trumps personal attorney this is outrageous!" meanwhile trumps real legal team is just waiting for the case to get to them on the supreme court
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w so today the fbi went and blew the door on a safe and rudy giuliani blew the door on his own safe
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w i hear bout people at parties that are basically plates. they are naked and have sushi all over them and like 50 people eat the sushi off them. seems unsanitary. which is why whenever im a naked plate i max serve 8 people. and instead of sushi (seems risky) i only serve cocaine
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w yah so ill listen to someone from the trump administration puff up about what bahgdadi sounded like when he was dying after they tell me what jamal khashoggi sounded like.
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w ive always felt like people with "real" before their name as their twitter handle seem really narcisstic and egocentric. people should really find a way to be more humble with their twitter names
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w was just sipping on a beer and organizing some of my junk and look what i found...

its like wheres waldo.😂 😂😂 rt if u find him. 😂😂😂 #MattGaetzIsATool
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w there aint gonna be such a thing as a good witness for trump. its either gonna be a witness against trump or a codefendant. i guess everyone in dc is gonna have to pick which they wanna be
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w excuse me, but the fact that trump could shoot someone on 5th ave and then fuck the corpse on camera and republicans wouldnt say shit but katie hill has to resign cause her shitty ex, a shitty journo, and a shitty media outlet put out pictures of her tits is fucking infuriating.
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w trump released a doctored transcript of the ukraine call and republicans want to attack schiff because they feel like he didnt quote the doctored transcript accurately? this is some seriously wild shit here.
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w gonna invite everyone i know to a gender reveal party where i walk up and throw a full magnum into the trash and then run around high fiving everyone
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w why are they playing baseball at this unamerican liberal anti trump rally? #Game7
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w i see a lot of "buy my replica [sex toy] " tweets and its quite inspiring tbh but i dont have any idea what the demand for replica dicks is so im just gonna smoke the rest of this blunt and think on it
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w i think imma go as spiderman in the hoody. but instead of shooting webs my super power will be to give everyone economic anxiety so they go full insane
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w with trump as pres the story is gonna be which nats if any go the white house to visit the loser that got booed. would be so much better if biden was pres. theyd all wanna go and biden would be super chill with it as long as they paid for their own bus ride over. #WorldSeries
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w was at the halloween store and got stressed cause theyre sold out of everything but then i found a deadpool mask. now just gotta stop at the liquor store and get the rest of my costume
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w lmao my costume is the wooooorst but glad the rum part of the costume cause half the bottle and a couple blunts got me vibing like this is what i look like 😂😂😭😭😭😭#HappyHalloween2019 u goblins
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w working on this now in case i need to do a costume change

@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w people handing out weed candy to kids isnt a real thing but there are sociopaths out there giving out candy corn
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w is economic anxiety a trick or a treat cause thats what im giving out
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w aight well headed out to see who dressed as what. hope yall have a safe and happy halloween. cheers
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w taking an uber home in my deadpool mask this morning means i won halloween right?
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w google bought fitbit which is concerning cause right now google thinks i masturbate with just my left hand and each stroke is like 6"...imma need to buy another one so google knows i use both hands and they can target me with the right ads
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w yall think ann coulter just eats as many kids as she can till her stomach hurts or sorts out all the kids she caught on halloween and limits herself to like 3 a day until theyre gone?
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w i like to think that whenever someone says okay boomer theyre just dunking on the krassenbros
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w ughhh still drunk from halloween kinda 😭😭😭 think im just gonna sit here and stare at my big black coffee until i feel better 😰😰😰
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w i bet tomi lahren spent all Halloween dressed up as aoc and recorded what she imagined a debate would look like
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w my sources are telling me beto is withdrawing from the race to focus fulltime on skateboarding through the darkness of night and stealing everyones ar-15s which he will melt down and reshape into a huge table for him to stand on.
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w beto drops out of the race and everyone starts chiming in that he should run for senate. why dont yall let him decide for himself what he wants to do??? its kind of maddening that people wont let him be so he can focus on convincing stacey abrams to run for president
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w i never have sex on nights when the time changes cause its impossible to know if uve been hard for 3 hours 4 hours or 5 hours and im a firm believer in safe sex
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w maybe if we taxes churches it could help pay for medicare for all. plus it would be nice of us to help them use their money to take care of the sick instead of giving it to politicians that want the sick to die
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w just found out that whited.com sells email addresses and now my goal is to achieve perfect balance in my life by working part time for them and part time for blacked.com
@HoarseWisperer @TheLoveBel0w yall havin a good saturday? im drinking rum and coke and making life plans.... what are yall doing?
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