My spine is doing that clicky thing I hate, so I am on bed, if not precisely in bed, with my favorite edition of the book. I love the annotations; they get me through the dry stretches 
My first edition was the one I read as an eleven year old, the Hildebrandt illustrated one, but I have misplaced it (give me Object Finding Energy pls). It is an abridged but no less dry edition, and I really want y’all to see the pictures I first saw. #cleovamps
Here’s Greg Hildebrandt’s website with the Dracula illustrations and sketches, so we’ve got that at least. spiderwebart.com/products.asp?s… #cleovamps
So anyway, I’m 11 (1990, two years before the Coppola movie) and I’m checking *this* obsessively out of the local library. When we get to a later part of the book, I’ll tell you why. #cleovamps
My mom didn’t let me watch Twin Peaks or IT (and she was completely right), but kids will always find ways to warp their own psyches. I just did it with ~literature. And to this day, I’m partial to brunettes; it may or may not be a coincidence. #cleovamps
However, I am here to start off a Dracula liveread gushing about Jonathan Harker. I love him. Even if you do an Imperialist Attitude check, he’s so curious and engaged: he even researched Transylvania before he left #cleovamps
(Since I’ve brought up imperialism—which is kind of interesting to keep in mind re: Dracula himself—Stoker was Irish. I wonder if that’s another horror subtext, though: vampires coming to colonize *the British* for once.) #cleovamps
The book tells us, pretty subtly, several things right off: Jonathan is curious and engaged; he researched and speaks a little German—a capable traveler; he wants a recipe for his future wife; he is DEEPLY OBSESSIVE about detail. In 2019 this would be a bullet journal. #cleovamps
Literal Notes to Self in this thing. But the story needs him to be detail-oriented, or it couldn’t exist. (Klinger’s annotations helpfully note local-color sections that Stoker ripped off from nonfiction works. Intellectual property in the Victorian era: good luck!) #cleovamps
(Mem., discuss the explosion of plays “based on” Polidori’s “The Vampyre” earlier in the century) #cleovamps
So Jonathan (aside from some Victorian-snobby comments about the locals’ dress. NO CORSETS, GOOD HEAVENS) is hype to be here and full of historical learnings. And then we hit “Count Dracula had directed me to the hotel.” Mm. #cleovamps
This is what I’ve always referred to as “People in Dracula Don’t Know They’re in Dracula.” Jonathan’s just learned a bunch of new words like “Wallachia” and “Bukovina” and sure, “Dracula,” that sounds legit, why wouldn’t it? (THUNDERCLAP) #cleovamps
And meanwhile we’re here 100+ years later going “CASTLE DRACULA. DO YOU HEAR YOURSELF.” But it doesn’t mean anything yet to these characters! They’re the only reason it means anything to *us!* #cleovamps
I think I originally said this in the context of “So there was a time in-story where ‘My new therapist’s name is Hannibal Lecter’ sounded fine.” It’s wild to us that people would not hear these names and just SPRINT, but we have to get past that. #cleovamps
Now, movies based on the Hamilton Deane play (like the Tod Browning/Bela Lugosi) just skip all this; they have Dracula just arrive like hey, what’s up, where are the ladies? The Coppola has this whole section be OMINOUS AS FUCK. #cleovamps
OH I should add that this is a great thread exactly on the subject of “there was a time when people didn’t know any of this.” #cleovamps
Back to the 1992 version. Everything is immediately scary and unideal. At which point I guess it’s the horror of “oh my God, I CAN’T TURN BACK I’LL LOSE MY JOB” which is relatable (“I HAVE TO KEEP GOING OR I LOSE MY HEALTH INSURANCE”) #cleovamps
Like, all the locals tell him to turn back, but HOW? There’s wolves and cliffs and glowing shit, Jonathan KNOWS he’s in trouble but what’s he supposed to do, tuck and roll out of this carriage? On a NARROW LEDGE? #cleovamps
He literally writes in his journal, if this book gets back to my fiancée and I don’t, “let it bring my goodbye.” Like. Tell my wife I love her, I want roses at my funeral. ONWARD #cleovamps
But, iirc, the first Hammer movie plays this a little more subtly. I was astonished when Lee just walks out like a very casual old-money kind of English lord, hey thanks for coming out here, doesn’t even have the Christopher Lee Voice yet. #cleovamps
And granted, some sketchy shit has already been happening. But the Hammer movie underplays Dracula because THE NEXT TIME you see him, they hit you with this: #cleovamps
For my money, as loose as the Hammer movies get, the way Lee approaches the character is the closest to the book. Gentlemanly, imposing... commanding... mmm stranger than we bargained for, but it’ll be fERAL MONSTER WTF HELP WHAT WTF WHAT #cleovamps
Admittedly, this happens a bit more gradually in the book. “Uhhhh is he climbing down a wall. Like DOWN a wall. Should he... should he be... doing... that. I am so screwed” #cleovamps
But I get ahead of myself. So you have this young solicitor, enthusiastic go-getter with a fiancée at home, and he wants to prove himself. He is a man of memoranda and time tables. Rationalism meets the Gothic. He is Not Prepared. #cleovamps
But he’s interested in local history and customs! He’s respectful! He’s... sure that... the howling wolves, and being locked into his room, and the hairy palms, that’s... that’s fine. That’s totally fine. #cleovamps
In fact he has this odd mix of “I haven’t even gotten in the carriage yet, TELL MY WIFE I LOVE HER” at every turn, and yet “Ooh, this guy is a fascinating conversationalist.” “I’m just gonna roll with this”/“I think strange things I dare not confess to my own soul” #cleovamps
Meanwhile, he describes his host. I’m gonna be real with you: Dracula is not, objectively speaking, hot. Christopher Lee leans into that with the exaggerated scare-faces. The fact that people find themselves *drawn to Dracula anyway* is what makes him compelling. #cleovamps
Side note, I think we all agree that Keanu Reeves was miscast, bless his heart, but on a certain level I get it. He’s really good in roles where he has to face an extreme situation with wide eyes (“whoa”) and then just roll with it. That’s not NOT Jonathan Harker. #cleovamps
The thing is that “whoa” works wonderfully for him in Speed and The Matrix. But he wasn’t an experienced enough actor to make it less modern and sell it in a British accent. He was set up to fail, pretty much, so they’d have a name that would bring in the kids. #cleovamps
(I feel like I was on the “HEY THE GUY *CAN* ACT IN THE RIGHT ROLES, SHUT UP” train very early on and was proven right, so I just kind of view the whole Bram Stoker’s Dracula thing affectionately.) #cleovamps
Meanwhile, because I saw the first episode of Watchmen last week (SHHH I’M NOT CAUGHT UP) I’m arbitrarily seeing Jonathan as Tom Mison on this reread, and I’m gonna tell you, I don’t hate it. #cleovamps
So now I’m going to take a break for lunch, and maybe come back a bit later with Jonathan’s travails in Castle Dracula, Sounds Legit. We’re going to take our time with this, probably several days, utterly wear out my welcome, #novampber, etc. #cleovamps
“(Mem., compare prices at other quaint Romanian inns)” #cleovamps
