Thread by @Edcrab_

Haven't done any RPG tweets for a while so... 1 like = 1 example of how my players ruined my plans and how I scrambled to (try) and fix them

Party kept the big bad talking. Thought they were trying to get as much information as possible but no, they bought time to hack the airlock controls and flushed him out into the vacuum of space (had to invent a lieutenant to replace that villain, but it worked out in the end)

Party took the standard "there's a bounty on this guy, go find him" hook to find and corner the assassin and... ask him if they could hire him to backstab their (admittedly shitty) employer. And he did. I moved them on from that town soon after

Party's telepath kept failing rolls by inflating DC with ridiculous specifics ("I want to see neutral memories of prisoner's 7th birthday" etc). It was deliberate: I forgot the telepath got +1 to rolls per failure. So when he asked a question that mattered, instant success

Party unexpectedly spared the life of a brusque, arrogant dragon because they wondered if he was actually quite young, hence the ego. I decided he was. I also decided to have him repay the favour and die saving them later, which made everyone really sad, because I'm awful

Party uncovered parts of a mystery, and... "Holy shit... our mentor... he's the only guy who could've planted that bomb!" They were right, but I hadn't realised this, it was a plot hole. But I instantly adapted and stole their idea. Everyone does it. Don't judge me

I included a very, VERY expensive cannon on an item list as a throwaway. The party immediately decided that purchasing this cannon was their new priority. Many crimes later they bought the cannon and brought down a giant robot boss that should've been virtually indestructible

Party member rolled low while trying to seduce a countess. He RP'd this as being far too drunk to remove his pants. When the count caught them, he rolled a 20 on persuasion: "I'm too drunk to take off my ale-soaked clothes. She was trying to help". So the count went to help too

The party hijacked a starship with a tracker. This tracker led to a rebel fleet being found and destroyed. The party never confessed to being responsbile for this. So I had their rebel contact admit she knew but liked them too much to rat them out, just to make them feel bad

The party killed a paladin because he said their orc friend had to die. This was planned for. But then they decided that this paladin's whole order was a threat. They killed two dozen paladins to save the orc, who by now was begging them to stop the killing

The party derailed a story about saving the world to rob the local thieves guild after their chief implied the party's rogue was unskilled. A meteor in the sky was literally getting closer every day and they paused in their quest just to spite the head thief

Oh boy that's too many likes! I'll come back to this later I'm sure I've got far more screwups but they escape me for now

I'm running out of things! This is now a highlight thread too. The party's melee fighter, constantly overshadowed by psions, broke cover and KO'd a pyrokinetic with a headbutt while screaming "I. HATE. PSYCHICS". The others surrendered or ran away

The party crashed an enemy's wedding. They ended up feeling too awkward to interrupt the ceremony or kill the guy. Just hung around, drank a bit. In the end we all forgot he existed and he got to stay with his new wife. He sent them a "thank you" ornament in the epilogue

The party worked alongside a space cop and a pirate. After the mission the space cop shot the party's pirate ally: "stun setting, don't worry". The party's hacker (of all people) then knocked the space cop out with the stock of his rifle: "Stun setting, don't worry".

Oh here's a REALLY old one: on a one-shot campaign we ruled that a nat. 20 let you take control of the narrative. "Look, it's Bigfoot!" He rolled a 20. So it wasn't just a distraction, Bigfoot was actually there. The grounded modern world campaign now included Bigfoot

I'm struggling to think of anything else for this thread (sorry, probably should've written everything up in advance) so although I might come back to this later I'm at least going to include my all-time favourite RPG campaign happening:

The bad guys in this campaign were a corporation (and secret cult) growing a new god in a vat. A psychic eldritch abomination to rule humanity. The cult was incredibly powerful and the being at the centre of their vast underground complex was potentially a reality-warping threat

Friend played exigent gene carrier (i.e. mutant) whose trait was her neuron density constantly increasing. She knew this would eventually prove fatal, but she also knew that in those last moments she'd understand/perceive literally everything in the universe

In finale, she linked minds with the Cthulhu-wannabe big bad. And she died. And in the instant of her death the psi blacklash fried the "god's" brain. The cult collapsed and 50 years on, her sacrifice inspired a philanthropic movement that played a big part in the next campaign

(thanks to Vince for reminding me of this one:) Player knocked the assassin's pistol from his hand. I roll dice in response
"What the hell?"
"He's a martial artist. You took his weapon, so that's his unarmed attack."
"...can I roll to hand him back his gun?"