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David Burge @iowahawkblog
, 6 tweets, 2 min read Read on Twitter
Today's #GloomyDave forecast: tailspin Hawkeyes get taken to the slide rule shed by filthy Purple Poindexters

Northwestern 38
Iowa 3.14159
I would like to take this opportunity to remind their alumni and fans that Northwestern is the second most prestigious college in Chicago
Yes I'm aware they're a mile north of the borderline cemetery in Evanston, home of the Women's Christian Temperance Union. I'm just going off their billboard claims
Fun fact: Evanston was a dry town until 1975. Not because alcohol was illegal, because NU students are afraid of drinking their first beer
I have to salute Northwestern as the only Big Ten team that only plays away games
I mean, just look at the name of the college. Let's face it, geography is not their strong suit
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All Nerds, Bow Before Your King
keep practicing, and some day hot Spanish girls will pay you to caress their locks with your sweet katana moves and Wolverine claws
Take it from ol' Dave: chicks will start paying attention if you give 'em a little peekaboo unbuttoned shirt action, especially the bottom buttons
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Sonics, "Louie Louie" > original by Richard Berry. Both are classics in their own right, but the Sonics version is definitive and arguably the first headbanger record ever made
Richard Berry's original is a fine mid-tempo R&B shuffle...
...rediscovered by Tacoma WA band Rockin' Robin Roberts & the Wailers a few years later...
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This is why you can't trust Wikipedia. Sure, I'm dead, but obviously my poetry is not "humorously bad"
my ghostly apparition remains floating in this mortal coil only to haunt the critics of my poetry
Someday, my doggerel will be universally proclaimed the finest works of art ever produced by a human being. Until then, I will remain in your timeline, eerily rattling my chains and dropping fart jokes
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@W7VOA I take this opportunity to remind readers that @TrueFactsStated and I reported exclusively last spring that @RealDonaldTrump was indicted under seal before Mueller was appointed.

patribotics.blog/2017/05/14/exc…
@W7VOA @TrueFactsStated @realDonaldTrump At the time, trolls said "that's not how any of this works" to this:

"The indictment is, perhaps uniquely, not intended or expected to be used for prosecution, sources say, because of the constitutional position of the President."

But it is *exactly* how all of it works.
@W7VOA @TrueFactsStated @realDonaldTrump It was the position of the DOJ under @Comey that a sitting President could be indicted, but not prosecuted. That's what @TrueFactsStated and I exclusively reported happened.

And it did happen, as will eventually be reported by everybody else.

Putting my marker down - again. :)
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Another reporter assaulted for filming police operations

bit.ly/2JcB9p7

#accesstoinformation #MediaFreedom

⁦@InfoMinZW⁩ ⁦@nickmangwana⁩ ⁦@OSISA⁩ ⁦@263Chat⁩ ⁦⁦@UKinZimbabwe⁩ ⁦@usembassyharare⁩ ⁦@euinzim⁩ ⁦⁩ ⁦⁦⁦@mailandguardian⁩ ⁦@CPJAfrica
@InfoMinZW @nickmangwana @OSISA @263Chat @UKinZimbabwe @usembassyharare @euinzim @mailandguardian @CPJAfrica A plainclothes police officer assaulted Panashe Makufa a local journalist with online publication Mail & Telegraph on 18 October 2018 in Harare after asking why he was filming a police blitz against illegal foreign currency dealers.

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Latest press statement: SANEF notes Meeting between the Sunday Times and the Hawks - 11 October 2018
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My daughter just tried pizza for the first time.
(While I appreciate the love this is getting I notice that a few Chicago pizza shops have tweeted it and I’d like to take this opportunity to remind you that whatever it is you’re subjecting your customers to — it’s not real pizza)
Since this tweet’s humming along and people are looking at the mentions, allow me to say:
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- Listen to the 538 pod (FiveThirtyEight.com/podcasts)
- Donate to the Center for Family Life in Sunset Park (donatenow.networkforgood.org/1413012)
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