Thread by @snarke

Welcome to today's #Trump #ImpeachmentTrial thread (potentially one of a few)! I've been playing around with tags a little in other tweets this morning but for now, I'm going to stick with the two I've used here. That may change later on, though. Follow/mute at will!

Today is going to be procedural stuff. The Senate will have to approve the (completely BS) rules proposed by McConnell. Dems will offer amendments, of course, but since a simple majority rules I don't have a lot of hope any of the amendments will pass. #Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

For those of you just tuning in, McConnell is proposing that this trial have:

Zero witnesses
Zero admitted evidence
Ridiculously little time set aside for opening arguments and questions.
As little sunlight as possible.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

IOW, Dude doesn't want a legitimate *trial*. He wants something Fox n' Co can call a trial when they use it to lie about #Trump's "total exoneration" (which isn't possible since he's impeached forever, but when have facts ever mattered to this crew?)

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

Dems will fight this, of course, but again: Mitch only needs 51 votes to pass his rules. A few GOP Senators have talked about breaking with their party but so far none of them have been very convincing.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

Whoops, I got my timing messed up. The Senate is convening now and the #Trump #ImpeachmentTrial will start in thirty-ish minutes, at 1pm EST (10AM here).

McConnell is on the floor of Senate, insisting that his rules resolution is fair and based on precedent.

That? Is a whopper of a lie.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

McConnell: This trial will show whether or not we can rise above the partisan BS that has gotten in the way of us actually governing. Oh hey, and have I mentioned lately how badly the Democrats suck and how everything is their fault?

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

This is a common abuse tactic: insistence that getting everything they want is the only way to be fair b/c they've decided what *you* want isn't legitimate. The goal is to distract you into defending yourself instead of focusing on the matter at hand.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

McConnell: Whatever the Democrats want I'm going to block. Because y'know, bipartisan precedent and stuff.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

McConnell: We have to hear opening arguments before we vote on witnesses because otherwise how will I insist that we can't change the rules mid-trial? FAIR IS FAIR.

BRB, I have to go punch something.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

Schumer's turn. He starts by promising that he will fight to make sure the press is allowed in the chamber to cover the #ImpeachmentTrial.

We're now almost twenty minutes late getting this #Trump #ImpeachmentTrial started. I don't know if the delay is good or bad, but either way, I would like it to be over so we can get this show on the road.

And right after I pressed send on that last tweet, the cameras in the Senate Chamber came back on.

Holy cow, I tweet it and it happens!

#ImpeachmentTrial #Trump

Here we go, everybody. The #Trump #ImpeachmentTrial has officially started. Let's do this.

The #Impeachment trial is underway. Up first is a two-hour debate over whether or not to adopt the rules proposed by McConnell. #Trump's lawyer is going first.

#Trump's lawyer: McConnell's rules are totes fair, y'all.

Schiff: Let me explain to you exactly how wrong McConnell's rules are. *goes on to do just that.*

One side is pretty confident they won't have to make an effort. I WONDER WHY.

#ImpeachmentTrial

OH SNAP. Schiff just played a video of #Trump saying that he'd love to have Mulvaney, Bolton, Pompeo, etc testify to the Senate.

I still don't think he's going to change any minds, but that was an awesome move.

#ImpeachmentTrial

ANOTHER VIDEO.

#ImpeachmentTrial

Schiff is pre-emptively blowing all of the possible rebuttals #Trump's lawyers could make out of the water. Sadly, it probably won't stop them from standing up and going full "nu-uh," and "your mom!" when it's their turn to talk again.

#ImpeachmentTrial

That was a masterful statement by Schiff. Now it's the #Trump team's turn for a rebuttal. Jay Sekulow rebuts Schiff's statement by...attacking Schiff personally and lying about the statement Schiff *just made.*

These people, y'all. These people.

#ImpeachmentHearing

In quick succession, Sekulow has lied about the Mueller Report, the Impeachment Investigation and whether or not the founders wanted "due process" (A CONCEPT THAT DID NOT EXIST WHEN THIS NATION WAS FOUNDED) for Presidents facing impeachment.

#ImpeachmentHearing #Trump

Oh hey, now Sekulow is lying about Obama and Eric Holder.

Blaming Obama! Everybody eat a cookie!

#ImpeachmentHearing #Trump

So many Sekulow lies, so little characters available for my tweet.

#ImpeachmentHearing #Trump

I think...I mean I'm not sure, but I think Sekulow is now insisting that, even though impeachment is clearly defined in the Constitution as being a Congressional responsibility, this should be decided in the courts because of....the Constitution?

#Trump #ImpeachmentHearing

Number of times the #Trump team has told the truth on the Senate floor so far: 0

#ImpeachmentHearing

Y'all, this rebuttal doesn't even reach the level of "back of the napkin" planning. It's pathetic.

#ImpeachmentHearing #Trump

Wow. WOW. Cipolone is not good at improv.

#ImpeachmentHearing #Trump

Between Cipolone and Sekulow, I bet there are a *lot* of completely filled Impeachment Bingo cards out there.

#ImpeachmentHearing #Trump

Cipolone: THEY'RE ASKING THE SENATE TO ATTACK OUR RIGHT TO CHOOSE OUR OWN PRESIDENT.

Oh honey. Just stop.

#ImpeachmentHearing #Trump

Cipolone *finally* finishes his ranting and storms back to his seat. If only that meant we wouldn't have to listen to him anymore.

#ImpeachmentHearing #Trump

And now we're into Senators submitting amendments to the rules. First up, Schumer submits an amendment requiring the White House to submit a crapton of documents (characterization mine).

#ImpeachmentHearing #Trump

What is especially smart about this is that the amendment includes documents related to the Bidens and Burisma.

#ImpeachmentHearing #Trump

Why is this smart? Because (among other stuff) if the GOP votes against this but then decides to allow for witnesses, there won't be any reason to call either of the Bidens in. After all, if the documents related to them don't matter, why call them?

#ImpeachmentHearing #Trump

A 15-minute recess is called and the cameras go off before we can watch a bunch of old white dudes trample over each other as they make a run for the bathroom.

#ImpeachmentTrial #Trump

We're back. It's the House Team's turn to defend the first Schumer amendment. Schiff begins by pointing out just how terrible and stupid (phrasing mine) the #Trump team's argument was.

#ImpeachmentTrial

Lofgren's approach to her statement is awesome. She's literally answering the questions the #Trump team is likely to raise. "Why do we need [thing]? Here's why"

#ImpeachmentTrial

This won't stop the #Trump team from screaming a bunch of lies and nonsense, of course, but it will need to be *different* lies and nonsense than before b/c Schiff already explained how it's "ass-backward" (HIS phrasing).

#ImpeachmentTrial

And Patrick Philbin is in charge of the #Trump team's rebuttal. His approach is....to just repeat everything the first two guys shouted but in a more somber tone. Of course it is.

#ImpeachmentTrial

Dude is trying to say that the House never voted to open an Impeachment Investigation, therefore, every subpoena issued was invalid. He knows that there are records of EVERY DAMN VOTE, right?

Oh, wait. I forgot which team I was talking about. My bad.

#ImpeachmentTrial #Trump

I mean, it's a different point than the Shouty Bros shouted but only barely and it is still demonstrably false. Dude is *lying*.

#ImpeachmentTrial #Trump

Just because you say it in the Most Boring Tone Ever doesn't mean its suddenly true, dude.

#ImpeachmentTrial #Trump

Oooh, Lofgren is *pissed*.

#ImpeachmentTrial #Trump

Lofgren yields to Schiff who says "#Trump team says we're not ready to present our case. We're ready. The House calls John Bolton. The House calls Mick Mulvaney. Let's get this trial started. The question right now? Is will you let us."

I love him so much.

#ImpeachmentTrial

Schiff is getting punchy. I dig it.

#ImpeachmentTrial #Trump

Here we go: A vote is being called on tabling the amendment (aka put it away and revisit it later). The first half of the vote is along party lines, but then the #MSNBC pundits started talking over the top of it, so I lost count.

#ImpeachmentTrial #Trump

Predictably, the vote fell along party lines. The amendment to subpoena WHITE HOUSE documents is tabled (for now). It's not dead yet, but it may as well be.

#ImpeachmentTrial #Trump

Next up, Schumer Amendment 2: Documents Boogaloo (title mine). This time we're talking about documents kept by the STATE DEPT.

#ImpeachmentTrial #Trump

Oh, and this is just about the call with Ukraine. We're still talking about Amendments relevant to the *first* Article of Impeachment.

This is going to be a loooooooooooooooooooooong day.

#ImpeachmentTrial #Trump

W00t! Recess! This one is supposed to be ten minutes.

#ImpeachmentTrial #Trump

We're back. Congresswoman Demings is arguing for the inclusion of State Department documents in the #Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

#Trump team's turn. Cipolone stands up and says "I won't repeat the arguments we've already made against these amendments." Goes on to attack Schiff.

🎶This is the song that never ends...

#ImpeachmentTrial

Cipolone yields to Sekulow, who says "let me give you some facts."

Me: OMG, YES PLEASE

Sekulow starts shouting about how Ukraine got the aid anyway so what's the big deal?!

Bro. BRO. Use your indoor voice. Also, learn what a fact is.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

Sekulow: LAWYER LAWSUITS! YOU ALL SUCK!

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

Schiff: Bro, are you *high*?!

Okay, he didn't actually say that. His tone of voice did, though.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

ARGH. And, once again, the Senate votes along party lines to table the State Department Documents Amendment. This isn't surprising but it's infuriating.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

Now a 3rd amendment is being read. This time the Democrats are asking for OMB documents.

This will go the same way the last two amendments have gone. It's tedious but it's important to get all of these Senators on the record for each of these things.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

Rep Crow is up to explain exactly why we need to see the OMB docs. He starts by talking about his time serving in Baghdad.

This won't stop the other side from vilifying him (or his service), but it makes for a compelling story.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

NICE. Crow is explaining *in excruciating detail* exactly why the OMB documents matter to the #ImpeachmentTrial. He's doing it by saying what is on them. The only way to prove whether or not he's right is by presenting the docs to the Senate.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

What's amazing is how, while #Trump's team has been shouting the same nonsense ALL DAY, the House Managers have limited their arguments to each specific amendment. There is so much evidence *against* Trump they haven't had to resort to repetition.

#ImpeachmentTrial

That was an amazing argument by Rep Crow. Now it's Sekulow's turn. He begins by complimenting #Trump for giving Ukraine *lethal* aid, unlike what Obama offered.

Because THAT'S what matters here.

#ImpeachmentTrial

OMG WHY ARE YOU STILL TALKING ABOUT OBAMA?!

Oh wait. Because you have no legitimate or legally sound way to defend #Trump. That's right. My bad.

#ImpeachmentTrial

Oh for f*cks' sake.

Sekulow ends his statement by asking where the Whistleblower is.

You are really really *really* bad at this, Jay.

#ImpeachmentTrial #Trump

Holy crap. Schiff's rebuttal to Sekulow--done almost completely off the cuff--was amazing. It'll be posted everywhere eventually and you should watch it.

#ImpeachmentTrial #Trump

And, predictably, after all that, the motion to subpoena OMB for documents is tabled in a party-line vote. Because of course it is.

#ImpeachmentTrial #Trump

RECESS! We get 30 minutes for dinner.

I don't even care that it's only 4:30 here. IMMA EAT SOME FOOD, Y'ALL.

#ImpeachmentTrial #Trump

And we're back. Rep Jeffries is arguing for Mick Mulvaney to be subpoenaed.

#ImpeachmentTrial #Trump

Jeffries is making a clear and precedent-based case for witnesses to be called and allowed to testify in #Trump's #ImpeachmentTrial. Dude did the math.

By contrast, it'll be a shock if Sekulow or Cipollone manage to get through their statements without eating their own boogers.

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Mike Purpura, speaking for the #Trump #ImpeachmentTrial team, gets up and says "there is NO REASON to change anything from the way witnesses and documents were handled during the Clinton trial."

YOUR SIDE IS THE ONE TRYING TO CHANGE THE RULES, BRO. CATCH UP.

Cipollone: [House Managers] spent the whole day telling you that they can't prove their case!

Right. And it totally didn't rain during #Trump's inauguration.

#ImpeachmentTrial

It is painfully obvious that even Cipollone doesn't buy the "I know you are but what am I" argument he's making.

#ImpeachmentTrial #Trump

Schiff has had quite enough of your nonsense, #Trump #ImpeachmentTrial team. So have the rest of us.

As he promised, McConnell calls for a vote to table the Mulvaney amendment. And, as expected the vote falls on party lines.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

McConnell asks Schumer to "stack" all of his potential amendments into a single vote. Schumer tells him to bugger right off.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

Huh. McConnell asks for a roll-call vote on "absence of a quorum." It's a fancy-pants way of asking for more time to figure out what to do next.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

Mitchy wants a nap. I'm guessing his hold on the GOP Senators is starting to slip--especially since the #Trump #ImpeachmentTrial legal team is so SO lame and doing such a terrible job of shutting down the arguments made by the House Managers.

This is a super interesting hiccough. Mitch has been adamant the rules will be decided TODAY, even if they have to go all night. His asking to stack the amendments is a whoopsie.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

By asking to stack, he's basically admitting that his side has already decided how they're going to vote on every amendment regardless of the facts/evidence, etc (which we all knew already but admitting it is a no-no).

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

It could also be a sign that the GOP stonewall is starting to crack. It's getting harder to pretend the House Managers don't have a case. Mitch might be facing some pushback.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

Huh. We're back--Schumer introduces an amendment calling for records from the Department of Defense.

Nobody's going home any time soon. Sorry not sorry, Mitch.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial team guy keeps insisting that it is *his* side that is fighting to keep the Clinton precedents/rules. Dude. Staaaahhhhp.

After a day of saying barely anything, Mitch is losing his voice. Still has enough of it left to call for a BS roll-call vote, though.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

And, like everything else, the DoD vote falls along party lines.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

Oops, zoned out for a bit. The current amendment being "debated" is to subpoena OMB Officials Duffey and Sandy.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

Thor save us all. The #Trump #ImpeachmentTrial team is sending Pam Fricking Bondi up to argue against subpoenaing Duffey and Sandy.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

Well *somebody* is jumping on her turn to tell a bunch of lies on the Senate floor. This is ridiculous.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

Schiff is *very* annoyed that he has to take Pam Bondi seriously. So am I.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

Aaaaand roll call. Watch now as this one goes the exact same way the others did.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

HOT DAMN, I'M SMART.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

Huh. Schumer introduces another amendment and as soon as the clerk is finished reading it, McConnell interrupts to beg for a "hard five minute" recess.

Something's up.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

The amendment proposed by Schumer: if the #Trump #ImpeachmentTrial team uses materials/evidence the House hasn't seen then *all* of the associated materials/evidence subpoenaed by the House must be shared.

No wonder McConnell looks scared.

Remember, McConnell has been suuuuper open about coordinating with the #Trump #ImpeachmentTrial team in the ramp up to the trial. He knows *exactly* what they have and what the House doesn't.

Our 20-minute "hard 5 minute" recess is over and now the "debate" on Schumer's amendment. We're nowhere near done for the day.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

Of all of the Schumer amendments so far, this one is my favorite. The Dems are forcing the Senate to vote--ON THE RECORD--on whether or not both sides should have equal access to all of the relevant evidence.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

This means the #Trump #ImpeachmentTrial team has to argue that both sides *shouldn't* get the same access to the evidence used in this trial. IOW they are forced to argue against the Rule of Completeness (aka the Legal Standard in every single other court of law in this country).

HAAAAAAAA. #Trump #ImpeachmentTrial starts their rebuttal with "This amendment shouldn't pass because Trump doesn't like it."

I mean, obviously this is going to fall along party lines just like every other amendment so far. But now every single lawyer for the #Trump #ImpeachmentTrial team and every Senator who votes against it will have to justify it.

Schiff: Let me remind you that we aren't the ones who set the schedule. We don't have to be here this late. We have no say in the schedule at all.

NICE.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

Aaaand vote. We know how it's going to go.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

Well that was predictable.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

Schumer is now proposing an amendment to subpoena Bolton. Yup, that Bolton. The same Bolton who said he'd be happy to testify *if he gets subpoenaed.*

I wonder how this will go! Nope, nevermind. No I don't.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

Oh hey, Nadler is presenting the argument for this amendment. I forgot he was in the room.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

Y'all, I'm pretty sure Nadler snuck in a nap. He's super fired up.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

Wow. WOW. Nadler gives a passionate speech explaining *exactly* why Bolton should be subpoenaed. Cipollone then gets up, calls him a liar and insists that the #Trump #ImpeachmentTrial has been nothing but respectful to the other side all day. What a tool.

Cipollone is trying so hard to seem like he cares as much as Nadler does. Cipollone is a bad actor. Pun TOTALLY intended.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

Jeeeeeeez. Cipollone is now insisting that "by asking you to vote they're taking away your vote!" and then demands that Nadler apologize to #Trump, his family, the Senate, and America.

And now it's Sekulow's turn. We're dooooooomed.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

Sekulow: LOOK AT WHAT WE'VE HAD TO DEAL WITH FOR THE LAST 13 HOURS. AND WHAT ABOUT OBAMA, HUH? WHAT ABOUT HIM? WHATCHA GONNA SAY NOW, NADLER? HUH? I'M GOING TO SHOUT SO I'LL GET MORE AIR TIME ON FOX NEWS!

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

Heh. Nadler gets back up and says #Trump's counsel has "no standing to talk about lying." You go get 'em, Jerry.

#ImpeachmentTrial

Schiff: When you find video of Barack Obama saying "Article 2 says I can do whatever I want" *then* you can compare him to Donald Trump.

NICE.

#ImpeachmentTrial

Chief Justice Roberts is now interrupting to admonish both sides "in equal measure" about the language they're using in their arguments.

Whole Room: Uh, what's this now?!

#ImpeachmentTrial #Trump

McConnell: In a move I'm sure will surprise no one, *asks for a roll-call vote on tabling the Bolton amendment.*

Read the room, dude. Nobody wants to hear you making light of your own obstruction.

#ImpeachmentTrial

Bolton amendment is tabled. WHO SAW THAT ONE COMING?!

Oh right. Everybody did. It's been a really long day, y'all.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

Schumer has proposed an amendment on procedural stuff--line item and phrasing changes. I stopped listening because I don't have the rules resolution in front of me to help me follow along.

#Trump #ImpeachmentTrial

Okay y'all. It's been thirteen hours. I think that's my limit. I need to eat some food and get some sleep so I can get back up and do this again tomorrow.

Thanks for reading my #Trump #ImpeachmentTrial tweets, everybody! I appreciate it! See y'all tomorrow!