Thread by @temiokomi

I went to a military secondary school. Now, in the Nigerian Army, like almost other armies in the world, a Field Marshall is the highest rank, but no Nigerian has ever gotten that rank & I really doubt if anybody will. It's just there to be admired because it's god status.

Only a commissioned military officer, in theory, can rise to become a Field Marshall. But. Among non-commissioned officers or "Other Ranks," the highest a soldier can get is the Warrant Officer Class 1. An officer by warrant. Or a Regimental Sergeant Major, RSM.

In NMS, two RSMs have achieved legendary status. RSM Yamusa Zakari Kumasi, the longest serving RSM in the school's history. If any retired General you know attended NMS, chances are RSM Kumasi flogged his behind.

Then the one I met; RSM Ibrahim Bandi. The RSM is a mini god. A "rugged" RSM is way more influential than many, many commissioned officers. And more feared & respected too.

Those two are absolute legends amongst Ex-Boys of a certain era.

Let me now digress a bit & tell another military story, as told to me by my Colonel mate. He was a Captain in Liberia(?) or Sierra Leone. I forget which. He was posted there during the civil war & ECOMOG. One day, rebels captured some ECOMOG soldiers.

My friend, who was a rookie in the war theatre, but was a Captain anyway, was given a truck filled with soldiers and a WO2 or Staff-Sergeant as his 2ic, to go negotiate the release of the captured soldiers from the rebels.

So my Captain commander & his bunch of soldiers take a truck & drive for hours until they get to the rebel base. The rebels are expecting them. My friend comes down with his bunch of soldiers and his soldiers fan out. Everybody has got itchy fingers but my friend...

...says since it's just negotiations, he isn't too bothered. Then the rebel commander tells my friend; "Captain, we can't allow you & your soldiers enter here with your weapons. Drop them here & come into our base so we can negotiate."

My friend thinks about it.

Turns around & tells his 2ic, a war-beaten old soldier veteran; "Tell the men to drop their weapons and let's go get our soldiers." The WO2 or SSgt (I forget which) hesitates & whispers; "Oga, we no go fit o!" My friend says he is shocked!

A direct order & this soldier is telling him he can't?! What nonsense! He says, very loudly; "I say drop your weapons and let's go get our soldiers!" 2ic says; "Oga, no vex, but we no go fit." My boy is livid! He is fuming!

Caveat.

There will be lapses in my recollection of this story because it was told to me years ago, while drinking booze & eating isi-ewu.

So forgive me.

Going on.

To make matters worse, the rebel commander now says, jeeringly; "Captain. It looks as if you're not in charge of your soldiers. That's a shame. If they won't obey your orders, you can drop your weapon with them & you'll be the only one allowed inside."

My boy says he is really mad, but keeps his cool. He has already decided on how he will charge his 2ic when they go back to HQ. So he tells his 2ic; "Okay. Wait here with the soldiers while I go negotiate with them," as he is removing his weapons.

In his mind, he is already thinking about the commendations he will get for bringing back the captured soldiers.
"Oga, we no go gree you go inside," says his 2ic.

WHAT?!

In this our Nigerian Army??!

My boy hollers.

His 2ic is unmoved.

My boy is mad! "I say I'm going inside there!"

2ic says; "No sir."

Then the rebel commander is screaming, "Did you come here to play?!"

My friend says he then decides to just go, when his 2ic holds him by his hand, pushes him backwards. Others push him backwards until...

...he is at the back of his considerable squad! Then the rebels all cock their weapons! His soldiers all cock their weapons too! Any funny movement now, people will start dying. He is at the back, wondering what the fuck is going on??!

After about 25 seconds of no movement...

...with EVERYBODY tensed as hell, the rebel commander says; "Okay. Go. We are not negotiating again!" Everybody backs away slowly, without removing their hands from their weapons. They allow the rebels back away first, before entering their truck.

He says 30 minutes into their ride back, he is still fuming! Wondering how a "simple" job could go so wrong. He says his 2ic is not looking at him.

Then the older man says; "Oga. Make I first apologise. I know say you go charge me when we reach but no vex. You see...

...I don dey here almost one year & I don see many things. How you think say dem take capture those other soldiers? Oga, war different o! If to say we drop our guns like this; na we HQ go dey come negotiate for. Those people for just hold us, kill some pipu.

Na dia method be that. Dem no get weapon so dem go tell HQ say make dem come negotiate. Once una reach, dem don hold una. E beta make we fite, dem capture us, than make we jus put gun for ground.

The time wen you tok say onli you go enter, I for gree o, but since you reach here, all man like you. You know dis work. But dis war so? Oga, you neva learn am well. E beta make you charge me than make I allow dem jus carry you like that."

My boy says as his 2ic is talking, his anger is just evaporating & he is beginning to understand. A war is not the war college. He now remembers stories of fresh officers killed in battle. Too much enthusiasm. Too much book. Not enough street intelligence.

He says after his 2ic has told him things (I can't go into many of them here), he turns and looks at the old soldier.

He nods his head & closes his eyes.

When they get back to HQ, after writing his report, he sends money to his 2ic to buy booze for every member of his squad...

...the soldiers saved his life when he was close to losing theirs. He learnt. He went on to other war theatres & distinguished himself but he learnt from that "illiterate" 2ic. Leadership is so much more than the books tell us. So much more.

Back to my main story.