Thread by @delaneykingrox

Bullets fired by transgender soldiers are 73.8% weaker than those fired by cisgender soldiers.
Tanks driven by transgender people are 26% likely to transform into a Subaru.

Missiles fired by transgender people become small water baloons by the time they hit civilians.

If you pin a medal on a transgender veteran, the medals have a tendency to transform into bears and attack everyone at award ceremonies.

Transgender pilots fly backwards, making missile attacks ineffective

If you say DEFCON 1 to a transgender person, they divide into 4 smaller transgender persons, causing a nightmare amount of HR issues

A transgender soldier caught in the blast of a landmine go super sayan with levels over 9000.

Transgender people have a gravitational field that causes laser painters to bend

Transgender people cannot pronounce the word "military" without summoning Juggalos

Transgender people cannot survive 9 g's in a simulator because their super elastic bodies make them slip out of the flight harness.

Transgender generals can easily be replaced by a small swarm of hamsters wearing a groucho marx disguise

"Ammo" is transgender for "a peanut butter and jelly sandwich", this has caused too many food related disasters in firefights

Transgender people age in reverse, so as you promote them, you are just setting yourself up for babies in the war room.

Transgender soldiers die when exposed to sunlight and garlic.

Transgender military police are entirely focused on doing crosswords using pen. In PEN.

Transgender people are all twice as tall as half their height. Fact. Obviously they cannot serve in the military due to this horrific fact.

Transgender helecopter pilots make the blades stay still, whilst the vehicle itself spins. Obviously this makes all the cisgender occupants (including all the juggalos) uncomfortable eating their PJ sandwiches

Space Force uniforms are made from woven unicorn cum, the natural enemy of transgender space marines

Transgender people hate nazis and KKK. Which causes a chain of command issue.

Transgender soldiers look too damn good in uniform, and it distracts those without sufficiant swag from the important task of killing scruffy people.

Transgender people are a menace in warzones because they tend to do their jobs...

...unlike those in power.

Transgender soldiers fart lasers. This isn't conducive to squad morale

Or... Trans people are a minority that is an easy target for facist technique of creating a scape goat for societial problems to be the 'solution' to, due to decades of horrific media and comedy portrayal and poor education, and the military is the easiest department to target.

Whatever. Hey voters?

Usually at this point in my rants would put a link to my ko-fi because I am poor. However I think you should instead donate to American transgender support charities.

Because fuck.