Thread by @ZachWeiner

The Song “Barrett’s Privateers”
Re-written from the American perspective
In order to irritate Canadians,
And especially Canadian cartoonists,
And in particular, @ryanqnorth

Oh the year was 1778
How I wish I was in New York Town,
Saw a Canadian bark in the Caribbean
‘Twas the scummiest vessel I’d ever seen

Chorus:

God bless them all, I was bold
and cruised the seas in a carrack of gold,
I fired my guns, at privateers!
Now I’m a wealthy man on a Nantucket pier
What a blast to be a mutineer!

Elcid Barrett had cried the town!
How I wish I was in New York Town,
For 20 brave men for a privateer crew,
But some fishermen was the best they could do

[Chorus]

The Antelope sloop was a sickening sight
How I wish I was in New York Town
She’d a list to the port and her sails in rags,
We had hundreds of guns and American flags

[Chorus]

On the tyrant’s birthday we’d put to sea
How I wish I was in New York Town
Sinking 95 boats, that’s one per day,
And dumping their gold in the cargo bay!

[Chorus]

On the 96th day we sailed again
How I wish I was in New York Town
When that bloody small schooner hove in sight
So we readied two or three of our guns to fight!

[Chorus]

Our frigate law low down with gold
How I wish I was in New York Town
We had stopped to prepare for their essays,
But to reach us took the Antelope two whole days

[Chorus]

At length they stood two cables away
How I wish I was in New York Town
Our hundred-four pounder made a single din,
Sunk their boat, disappointing all the gunnery men

[Chorus]

The Antelope shook and pitched on her side
How I wish I was in New York Town
Barrett was smashed like a bowl of eggs
But we rescued this kid who’d lost both his legs

[Chorus]

So, we got him home in his 23rd year
How I wish I was in New York town
It’s been six years since we took his gold,
But Canada’s far away and cold.

[Chorus, slowly, as a choir of American marines crescendo the Star-Spangled Banner while F-35s hover overhead]