MONDAY
- Threats of deselecting Tory MPs redoubled
- Boris Johnson teed up a GE by saying he didn't want one
- Rebels drafted bill requiring A50 extension until 31 January 2020
- Plans mooted to mint 100 new Tory peers to flood House of Lords
- New puppy for Number 10 Lovebirds got way too much media attention (ok, super-cute, but...)
- "Get Ready" for Brexit propaganda campaign began, spawning a thousand memes
- 21 long-serving Tories booted out, including Ken Clarke & Nicholas Soames
- LibDems gained a defecting MP
- Boris Johnson made a ludicrous rambling speech
- Jacob Rees-Mogg lounged on the front bench
- Rebels defeated the Government
- Government majority +1 to -43
- BJ blasted in PMQs for his racism
- Lost Rebel bill vote
- Lost attempt at snap GE
- BJ called Corbyn "big girls blouse"
- JRM lounged like an entitled idiot on the front bench
(Oh, and there was a spending review by Sajid Javid. Normally a big deal, but nobody cared)
- Brother Jo resigned over BJ's Brexit direction
- Heckled on a walkabout (made 6pm news)
- Heckled again
- Made worst (?) stump speech of his political career in front of wall of police
- Used police cadets for propaganda purposes
- Near-ignored fainting police officer
- Secret prorogue memos released
- JRM compared doctor to struck off quack Andrew Wakefield
- BMA and Chief Medical officer told off JRM
- JRM apologised
- Rebel Bill to delay Bexit passed in Lords
- Boris Johnson was revealed to have called David Cameron a "girly swot" in a previously redacted note from August
- BJ lost control of a bull (really!) while on walkabout and it sideswiped a protection officer
- KFC told them off
- Tories sent cold greasy chicken with stickers of Corbyn's head to journalists
- JRM apologised for slandering a doctor
- The police complained about BJ using them for propaganda purposes yesterday
- Rebel alliance said they'd vote down GE attempt
- Two more Tory MPs declared they won't stand for re-election
- We all moved one day closer to death
Have a great weekend. I'm sure it will be better than his!
theguardian.com/commentisfree/…