Domestic violence is never ok.
I've met hundreds of women who have come to see me over the years who were in abusive relationships and a constant request from many of them is to pray for them and ask others to as well. Here are the stories of four of these women. (Thread) #DomesticViolenceAwarenessMonth
I request you to read them in their entirety with an open heart and real love. Then, as this night begins to enter into its late hours, I would ask you all to join me in praying for each one of these women as well as the thousands of others who have similar stories.
The first woman came to see me the day after her husband had struck her in the face. She has a pleasant demeanor, is not so well-versed in her religion, but had a desire to learn. For the past few years her husband on and off has hit her.
He then leaves without giving any indication of where he is going or what he is doing while he is gone. At times he is apologetic and promises that he will no longer be that way and that sometimes she just makes him angry.
They have a young son who she is worried about. Her family is not supportive as they disagreed with her choice to marry because he came from a different cultural background and have since adopted a “we-told-you-so” attitude.
She is now seeking counseling and support from different agencies to help her get through this confusing time. She asked me to keep her in my prayers and to ask others to as well.
A second woman came to see me whose husband was unfaithful to her multiple times in their marriage. Her in-laws have always mistreated her and she herself is at a crossroads with her own family as they are not Muslim but she is.
She has assumed the financial responsibility of their home as he no longer works nor shares the savings that he has. The most recent revelation of infidelity caused no reaction in her as she’s become accustomed to it and is so numb that it doesn’t bother her anymore.
She has a daughter that she worries will grow up devastated if her father is not present and for that reason put up with everything, but has come to realize that line of thinking didn’t make sense. She asked me to keep her in my prayers and to ask others to as well.
A third woman came to see me, this one younger than the others. She hasn’t completed high school and finds herself in a place of confusion because of her home life. Her father is angry always and spends most of his time. “My dad, like most south Asian dads, has a temper issue.”
She was 9 years old when she first witnessed her dad beating her mother. Now in her teens, she witnessed the aftermath of more abuse. Her mother had come into her room.The young girl told me, “Her eyes were watery, she was holding her neck, and had said “He hit me on both sides.”
To my eyes, he looked like he strangled her. They were red hot and bloating. I stared in panic, I didn’t know what to do.” She asked me to keep her in my prayers and to ask others to as well.
A fourth woman came to see me who as a child had been sexually abused by an Imam who taught her qur’an. Years later, the experience still stays with her and has had a deep impact on her relationship with God and her faith.
She has trouble praying and experiences flashbacks while trying to read the Qur’an. She asked if I had ever met anyone who went through something similar and I said that yes, unfortunately I had. The validation she receives from her family is limited.
Her mother tells her that where they come from this is something that happens often. So that it’s something that she shouldn’t be bothered by so much. She asked me to keep her in my prayers and to ask others to as well.
Please do keep these women and all women who have had the misfortune of having men in their lives who have no idea what it means to be a man.
If you have the conviction, resources, wealth, and know-how, please help to build organizations, institutions, and agencies that the Muslim community is sorely in need of. No one will build for us what we have to build for ourselves.
If we are not the ones helping our mothers, our sisters, our daughters, or any of our women, then who will?
