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Earlier today i took a 30 click trip into twitter's magatown. It can best be described as the equivalent of pulling one's brain out of a nostril and chucking it into a thick patch of blackberry briars. I ended up finally stumbling into evangelical Christian twitter. Never... /1
been there before and if God truly loves me I'll never be there again. Apparently the new good news is that Jesus only loves conservative Americans, firearms, unborn fetuses, and the use of any violence nessary to ensure the safety and whiteness of our blessed society. It was../2
also quite odd seeing a congregation of blowhards using the word socialism like it sprung forth directly out of the devil's bunghole, even though Christ is the ultimate socialist. Also, apparently every liberal leaning American longs for the day when we can kill a baby.../3
after it's been born. The cherry on top of my journey into the bizarro church of something is the almost universal agreement that if any American opposes donald chump they are traitors to America and offending God in the worst possible way. Well, after all that incredible.../4
bullshit i started clicking my way outta there like a brown recluse was chasing my twitter typing finger. Lo and behold as i raced the f**k outta there i was ztopped in my tracks by a post by Pat McCrory, a man i wouldn't exactly say brings out the best in me being as he.../4
damn near turned my beloved state into the Mississippi of the Carolinas. Anyhoo, i fulfilled my duty as a true blue Tarheel and reminded him why his dumbass is doing a podcast out of a little office instead of hucklebucking the living shit out of my state. Out of nowhere a... /5
a fellow Carolinian who identified himself as a conservative Christian engaged me in banter. I knew for certain that the conversation was going to end with the words "you're a pathetic shit speck stuck to an ass hair on the devil you nazi douche hammer, but instead what insued./6
was the best conversation I've ever had with a conservative Christian on social media. Feel free to look it up on my profile. The moral of this story is simply this: if we must crawl through a thousand patches of briars and brambles to reach a single American across this awful./7
political and cultural divide it is truly worth the intensive mind f**king required to reach that place. If it is only one we should reach at a time, that's 100% percent better than none at all. All that being said, if you ever endevour into the land of twitter prophets, and../8
they literally refer to themselves as prophets don't expect much until you're tapping your ass outta there like a rabbit trying to outrun tRump jr. and his hunting guide in their stupid f**king Land Rover. If you have read all of this yarn i certainly appreciate your attention.✊
